Lessons from Moving My Family to Hong Kong During COVID

Uncertainty and Fear Can't Stop a Vision

One of my strengths is executing and refining a vision. Although there might be a lofty strategy, beautiful presentations, and developed ambitious roadmaps, something critical is missing: the bridge between your vision and your team's daily reality. Despite the uncertainty, the lingering questions, the temporary failures that are always present, we can reach the destination. What gives me such confidence? Why do I know that we can pick a better path out of the sometimes chaotic, always demanding environments?

Although I could detail several professional accomplishments across multiple industries and roles, those would not explain the source. A personal story about my introduction to, life in, and departure from Hong Kong can show more than general statements about designing strategies, creating operational efficiencies, or implementing systems. My experience in HK gives me the ability to trust the process.

How we ended up in HK

In 2020 my husband and I were living in Evanston, Illinois. My husband was in his final year of his PhD when COVID hit. The job market in the US came to a halt. Fortunately, my husband still received two job offers: a research position in Hong Kong and a teaching position in the states. We were faced with two options that would mean very different outcomes for our lives. When evaluating these options, we made sure we stayed true to the vision for our family and our individual career goals. That meant we were moving to HK during a pandemic.

Introduction to HK

Hong Kong?was a place I wanted to visit but had no intention of moving to. Once the decision was made, planning began. The logistics to travel to a highly regimented territory on the other side of the world during a pandemic were nearly?comedic. To even travel to HK, we (including our two kids under 3) had to complete stringent COVID testing requirements that almost made us miss our flight.

In a future post, I might tell the story about our nearly missing our flight to HK even though we were at the check-in desk four hours before the flight departure. After arriving at HK International, we walked through the eerily deserted halls?while we filled out forms and then eventually had PCR tests. We waited 8 hours--yes, 8 hours--mostly at socially distanced desks. (The security grudgingly?allowed me and my husband to move our desks next to our kids'.) Once our results were negative, we were whisked away to our hotel for our 2-week quarantine. Under the circumstances, our hotel room was phenomenal, and we were more than lucky to have found it. (Little Tai Hang, you were attentive and treated us well.)

When we were finally permitted to leave the hotel, we ventured through Victoria Park on?our?way to a grocery store. In the store, the aisles were narrow, with barely enough room for one person to pass. I couldn't read almost any label, and I didn't recognize any brands on the shelves. At that moment, I thought to myself,?how can we stay here? What have we done?

Life in HK: Plans, Goals, and Community

After leaving quarantine, we temporarily stayed in Sai Kung for a couple months while we are searched for a permanent place. While there, I made a plan to start small. Each day, I would take the kids to get a few groceries. I started using Google Translate to review the products and ingredients for the most important items I needed.

?A couple of things happened:

1. My kids became less manic in the busy stores
2. I became more confident and comfortable

Sai Kung offered larger homes,?mountainous terrain,?fresh fish,?and beaches. But living there was much harder than we anticipated,?because there was more isolation. Meeting people was very challenging.?While in Sai Kung, we celebrated our first Christmas away from family and friends. My daughter, at three, accused my husband and me of keeping her away from her family. I listened and empathized. After she settled down, we called family members and let them know how much we missed them, then focused on what we could control. This was the start of a new Christmas tradition: buying ornaments to represent all the places we have traveled.?

From our experience in Sai Kung, we realized community was key to our family's happiness. Because many people were avoiding each other throughout the city and I was working remotely, meeting people was difficult. We explored other areas of the city to find a region that was a better fit for our family.?While visiting Discovery Bay, we instantly felt the sense of community. It was slower-paced and geared towards families,?but it banned?private?vehicles. Living in the US, a car represented independence, and this choice meant I had to give up control. This was difficult for me, but I made the choice anyway since it was best for our entire family.

As a family, we spent the majority of our time outside, hiking, enjoying parks and beaches. Soon, we noticed other families doing the same thing. Simply by being outside, we organically started making friends. Only after integrating into the community, we started to hit our stride in HK. Now we have amazing friends from all over the world.

Departure from HK

As we were making friends and building a life, the increasingly steep punishments for rule violations were significant challenges. These included forced hospitalizations for COVID-positive tests (regardless of the age of the person who tested positive) and forced?quarantine in shipping containers (3 person max) for close?contacts. To manage the fear of separation, we avoided activities that required our family to be tracked. If we went out to eat, we ordered and ate outside. We did not go to the gym; instead, we hiked in the country parks. We paid with cash.

Towards the end of our stay, there were multiple reports of other children being separated for weeks from their parents. After a positive test in our community's sewage, government officials ordered everyone in our community to be tested. With the testing mandate, our increasing fear of my children testing positive and being separated from me and my husband pushed us to leave Hong Kong and start a new adventure in Amsterdam.

The decision to leave Hong Kong also came with challenges, we had to find a territory that?would allow us to travel there without a COVID test prior to travel and still had plane?connections to HK. London was one of the only places that met these requirements. We were and are?incredibly fortunate to have a great support system. My dad agreed to meet me and the kids in London, and we booked the trip. I knew leaving my husband in Hong Kong would be hard for me and the kids, so making memories in London was key.

To meet my dad, we had to fly from Hong Kong through Istanbul to London, with a total travel time of 18 hours (including a couple-hour delay in HK). I learned the hard way that when traveling alone with a lot of luggage, you have to carry ALL your luggage through customs by yourself. I had 9 pieces of luggage, a double stroller, and 2 kids (3 and 5 years old). To make this trip enjoyable and minimize jet lag, we decided to break up the travel and stay in London for a few days before leaving.

During our?stay in?London, we explored the city and had a great time. My most cherished memory from this trip was how impressed my dad was with my kids' flexibility during travel. The trains in London had many interruptions. On one trip, we had a two-hour delay getting back to our hotel. Instead of complaining, they started playing a game together to pass the time.?

?I learned a lot from this experience:

1. Listen to others and trust your intuition: when the team or you have concerns, try to understand and address their feelings.
2. Stay true to your vision:? make decisions based on mutual goals to get the best outcomes.
3. Create a community:?surround yourself with people who have shared purpose and values.
4. Be flexible: when doing something new, make a plan but be prepared to learn and pivot based on new information.
5. Learn and let go: move on from failure with a new perspective looking for new opportunities.

Leading a team comes with unexpected challenges and requires flexibility, empathy, and a proactive approach. By facing fears directly, making thoughtful plans, and building a supportive community, you can navigate through uncertainty and come out stronger on the other side.

How have you navigated significant changes in your life or career, and what strategies helped you the most?

?Leadership #ChangeManagement #PersonalGrowth #Resilience #Adaptability #Vision #ExpatLife #CommunityBuilding #TransformationalChange

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