Lessons from a 3 year old
I read a post by one of my connections yesterday Yasmin Ali which has really prompted me to think long and hard about the way in which we communicate!
Yasmin runs craft workshops both for children and more recently for adults looking to either have a team building exercise or as a therapeutic 'break out' from the day to day of commerce.
I posed a question as to how her language (both verbal and non verbal) tone, pace changes when working with young children, older children (sorry, young adults!!!) and adults.
We often see, adults either bend, or kneel down to be closer to young children when they speak 'face to face'. They give consideration to the words they use, the pace, the tempo, the tonality of those words, all adapted to the person they are communicating with, in order to maintain rapport and illicit the response and reaction we are hoping for!
Why is therefore, if we are so good at doing it with young children, that some many are so ambivalent to applying the same considerations when speaking to other adults!
We've all heard the phrase:
"Do unto others, as you would have done unto yourself"
And whilst there is some merit to this, its actually quite lazy and presumptive.
That's suggesting, this is the way I want to be spoken to so you will too?
But there is a far bigger problem...
You see, almost 30 years ago Tim Berners-Lee 'gifted' the world with the World Wide Web. Giving EVERYONE on the planet a means of being able to communicate with EVERYBODY else on the planet!
And yet 30 years on, and now EVERYONE on the planet wants to communicate with you! In a world so full of 24/7 communication from so many different media, it has never been more chaotic in everyone's minds as to WHO and WHAT to listen to!
And things are only going to continue to get worse!
The speed of growth of the Internet of Things, has determined we are all demanding even greater connectivity. And with it, more and more demands on us to communicate!
Perhaps if we REALLY want to communicate effectively, we need to understand WE need to be willing and able to adopt OUR language in terms of both choice of words, and how they are spoken, tonality, pace, volume, sentiment, environment in order to be the prefered method of the receiver of that communication.
I still chuckle at the email received early last year from a reputable and well known Spa, after I had visited recently. They had created an automated email to be sent to all guests 24hrs after checkout asking a series of questions about my visit with the promise all responses would be placed in a monthly draw to win a free return trip! - (So far so good)
Within the questions, were things like:
- Were you greeted warmly as you arrived by our reception staff?
- Were you given a full tour of the facilities that left you feeling comfortable and informed as to all that was available to you?
- Was the temperature in your treatment room suitable throughout your treatment?
- Was there any member of staff that 'stood out' throughout your stay?
Great questions suggesting they really cared about my experience. However, there was one slight problem. It had been my partner that booked the this for me as a gift. And although she had booked it for me, and the reception staff and treatment staff had all addressed me throughout my trip (including completing a medical questionnaire on arrival) the email was addressed to Mrs Amanda Daniels-Allen!
In a world where the art of effective communication is becoming SO MUCH more important than ever before. To be able to 'cut through' the 'noise' and be heard for who you are, what you are and what you offer. Is it not time you reviewed both your internal and external communication channels to ensure you are picking up on EVERY opportunity to build Know, Like, Trust rapport with every prospect, client/customer, member of staff, colleague, family member etc?
Having studied Psychology throughout my formative education career, specialising in Communication and Human Behaviour. And more recently studying NLP and the internal dialogue we all play out every day. As both an award winning speaker, and adult education facilitator, I devised in 2017 a Communication MASTERCLASS entitled Pitch Perfect.
This one day highly interactive workshop looks at both you, your audience and your message and reviews Who, How and Why we communicate in the manner we do. Reviews the effectiveness of this? and determines how we can amend/enhance our own communication to influence far greater responses!
For example: Are you aware, that every time you have a conversation with 1 other person, there are 62 conversations playing out in your minds!
Please share this post with those you think may benefit from reading and don't forget to drop me a message if you'd like to know more about the SECRET ART of HIGHLY EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION.