The Lessons Fear Teaches

“In every [life] phase, you’ll be confronted with something that scares you. And you have to go into it being as fearless as you can.” – Rebecca Minkoff

I don’t know about you, but I don’t much relish being afraid. Yet I’ve experienced quite a lot of fear in my life. What I’ve learned about overcoming fear has as much to do with accident as it does with design.

Let me elaborate.

Crippling fear, the kind that prevents you from interacting with others, that causes you to cringe if someone looks at you, to hide at home so that you won’t encounter a situation you don’t feel you can handle – that kind of fear is life-sapping. It does no one any good.

I’ve been there. If you’ve also been there, keep reading. If you know someone who’s not only been there but may still be there, there’s something here you can share as well. If you’ve never been there, I salute you. But you might still want to keep reading, since fear can sneak up and take anyone unaware.

Just like an earlier post on the benefits of failure, fear has important lessons for each of us to learn:

·      Fear alerts us to possible danger. You need this in order to protect yourself and others.

·      Much fear is self-imposed and not based on reality. The tendency is to wonder what will happen if the most outrageous or impossible happens, yet most fears don’t spring from clear and present danger.

·      You can work yourself into a state of fear – and you can work yourself out of it as well.

·      Sometimes fear is contagious, as when there’s a disease outbreak and you’re understandably afraid that you or your loved ones may be vulnerable.

·      Fear is an emotional reaction to real or imagined circumstances.

·      Physiological responses to fear are common and, although frightening, usually aren’t life-threatening.

·      Overcoming fear requires courage and determination.

·      Careful analysis of what you’re afraid of often helps contain the emotion before it gets out of hand.

·      If you know what you fear, you can come up with an approach to deal with it.

·      Since fear tends to produce paralysis and an unwillingness to take action, you need to react fiercely and fearlessly to get past it.

·      There’s a certain momentum that accompanies the decision to move ahead and past fear. Once you start going, your self-confidence gets a boost from taking positive steps to defeat fear.

How do you train yourself to be fierce and fearless when confronting fear? It takes practice and determination. Once you’ve beaten fear that’s held you captive, you know that you’re capable of this proactive and life-affirming stance.

It’s important to note that being fearless doesn’t mean acting foolishly or recklessly. While you do entertain some risk when attacking fear, it’s a calculated risk that offers greater upside than any downside.

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See more on my website, suzannekane.net.

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