A Lesson Learned Beyond Ivy Walls

Back in 2016, after graduating from college, I was awarded the Rockefeller fellowship to spend a year traveling somewhere to seek something personally meaningful. The fellowship parameters were intentionally not prescriptive to encourage students to figure out what works for them.

I had applied for the fellowship because I felt stuck in a 'go, go, go' mode—graduating high school with good grades, applying to top schools, taking tons of classes, etc. I also felt a little lost. As an undergraduate, I thought that I wanted to become a professor, but after multiple research internships, I was not sure if that path was for me. Instead, I wanted to take a step back to reflect on what I really wanted, and the fellowship presented an incredible opportunity to do just that. I chose to spend my year in Indonesia—where I aimed to just be, learn about the culture, and informally study dance, poetry, and philosophy (while having lots of career conversations to figure out what I wanted to do).

In college, I spent a lot of time reading, listening to lectures, and being fascinated by ideas—moral psychology, polarization, colonialism, behavioral economics, etc. Some of my favorite courses involved spending significant time debating theories and/or moral issues. I loved writing essays about Tolstoy and art, reading Edward Said's work on colonialism, or debating Jonathan Haidt's work on moral psychology. To me, college felt like being a kid in a candy store—endlessly fascinating

My time in Indonesia was so different from my time at Harvard—no structures, no calendars, no timelines, no guidance, and no expectations. I experimented with different things and at some point, started attending informal classes—a casual group of people who gathered to read, discuss, and practice. I saw the first book they were reading and just read the thing. I think one of my strengths—and one that Western education highly values—is “learning” quickly. This is the type of somewhat superficial learning where we read fast, figure out the main concepts, critique, and synthesize. It does not involve actual practice.

I remember the "teacher" suggesting that if reading came easily to me, perhaps my challenge was to read significantly less and instead spend a week thinking not only about the work in the abstract, but also about what it actually meant for me in practice. In short, how might I show up differently based on what I read?

To this day, this is a lesson I've taken to heart. I've made a mental distinction between reading for abstract curiosity and intellectual enjoyment, and learning through reflection and practice—the kind of learning that transforms our actual beings. This type of learning felt lacking in my Ivy League education—at least in my experience. College was significantly more skewed toward intellectual curiosity rather than practical application. Even if a student really wanted to, I sometimes wonder if the immense intensity we put students through doesn't allow them the mental space for genuine reflection

As I reflect on 2023 and the past decade (I turned 30 this year), I feel that one of the most helpful lessons I learned was to clearly distinguish between learning and practiced learnings—those that subtly transform how we show up. One specific example for me lately has been around showing up for Gaza - not just “learning”, but considering actionable steps to become a more engaged global citizen.

In 2023, what did you learn that was just interesting in theory? What did you learn that shifted the way you show up?