A Lesson from My Dad: Ask Good Questions and give people the 'Stage'

“Better than a thousand days of diligent study is one day with a great mentor.” - Japanese Proverb

When I was a young man just out of college, I struggled with direction and finding a career path. It was a time of youthful uncertainty, not knowing what I wanted to do while being at an age that I knew I had to get my act together and do something.

His entire career, my dad worked as a management consultant for a Chicago based firm. This was back in the days when airline travel included meals and silverware on all flights, and professional business travelers wore their suits on the plane. He traveled my entire childhood to projects around the country, helping companies improve productivity and reduce costs.

Recognizing me 'floundering' to find myself and my career path, he gave me an opportunity to work for his small consultancy, Cardinal Management Systems. Suddenly I found myself on a plane, wearing a suit and working at food processing plants (his speciality), doing time studies, observing operations and taking notes. I was known as a 'green pea' in the consulting business at the time, and was given the grunt work... doing time studies on each shift, including the grave yard shift. Standing in a refrigerated chicken processing room or loading dock at 2 am during wintertime in downtown Chicago doing time studies was quite the learning experience!

I learned a thing or two from my Dad, a very seasoned consultant, during that time. I got the unique opportunity to see my dad in a professional setting, and gained a ton of respect for him in terms of the way he handled himself. He was a true professional.

One thing in particular that I learned from dad was to ask good questions. As an out of town consultant, employees perceived us in a negative light. After all, I was a young guy in a suit, carrying around a clipboard and notepad (way before IPads), taking notes about what I observed. Employees were nervous and skeptical of me, and rightly so. I was there to improve efficiencies, and make change. No one likes change, and no one 'helped me' do my job.

Frustrated by this fact, I asked my dad how to 'break the ice' with the supervisors and other people I had to learn from in order to understand their processes. He gave me a piece of advice that has served me ever since. That advice was to ask good questions and give people the opportunity to showcase their knowledge and understanding of a subject. Give them the 'spotlight', so to speak... In other words, put them in the position as 'teacher'. I took this advice, and instead of being perceived as a 'know it all', I was perceived as a 'learn it all', respecting the depth of experience and knowledge of the good people working in the processing plant. This put me in a better light with them, broke the ice, and enabled me to be more effective in my role.

Dad's advice back then still sticks with me today, 30 years later, in my career as an Executive Coach, as I continue to ask questions and be a 'learn it all', giving others the stage. By asking good questions, I have been able to learn while giving space to people to showcase their knowledge and talents.

Ask yourself, "Do I give people a chance to showcase their knowledge and experience, or am I a 'know it all'? And, "How can I build deeper relationships with people by learning from them and giving them a platform to shine?"

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Troy Jacobson is an Executive Coach and Vistage CEO Chair with over 30 years of leadership experience. Learn more at www.troyjacobson.com