A lesson from a 5th-grade problem solver
I’ll never forget the day in 5th grade when a boy in my class, let’s call him...Jim, found a love letter I wrote to my girlfriend. I remember Jim terrorizing me every day with the threat of reading my love letter out loud to everyone in class. For weeks he’d take my lunch money, and make me do dumb stuff like carry his backpack around for him.
I remember going home one day and realizing that I had two choices:
- Let Jim read my letter to the class and become the laughing stock of the whole school - I used words like “my heart aches longingly for your touch”
- Continue to be Jim’s whipping boy
After a sleepless night, I chose “1.”
I went to school the next morning ready for my fate. I remember walking up to Jim, and before he could say anything - I said, I’m not going to do what you ask me anymore, I’m done. You can read the letter to everyone, I don’t care.
Guess what happened? Nothing. Jim just stared at me not knowing how to react and walked away. He never read my love letter to the class.
I still think about those few agonizing weeks, because it taught me a lesson in problem-solving.
When faced with seemingly impossible decisions, visualize the worst-case scenario, and pick the lesser of the two evils. Just make a decision.
I’ve learned that not making a decision is far more costly than making the wrong one. Because at least with the wrong decision you can learn from your mistake and move on, but indecision just sits there in your subconscious terrorizing you. More often than not, after you make your decision, you’ll realize it wasn’t that bad after all. And most of your worst fears are just like Jim, all bark and no bite.
Your 5th grader all grown up,
Ronnie Coleman
Project Manager | Delivery | Business Development
5 年Ronnie, thanks for sharing, love it! Totally agree with you. When I have hard times, I use the following practice: I ask myself, will this situation matter to me in 3 years? Usually, even very bad case is not that much critical and in 3 years you'll not remember it or it will be not important. It helps to stay calm and relaxed.?
Mechanical Engineer | Development Engineer
5 年Love this! Indecision is also a decision. Making the decision not to act. And sure enough, it’s one of the worst thing we could do to ourselves.
Founder & CEO at Purple Haus | Speaker | Author | Producer
5 年I get that it's totally not the point, but did your girlfriend ever get her letter? More seriously, thanks for sharing. The story was adorable and insightful. It's a cautionary tale about "catastrophizing" scenarios in our minds where the threat is almost always greater than in reality. You were wise even then.
We always magnify the problem and think worst-case scenario.? It's never as bad as we think.? Good read.?