A Lesson in Compassionate Leadership

Unless you live in complete seclusion, and without any source of public communications, it is impossible today to not hear, read about or be persuaded by someone else’s opinions and judgements.

I am old enough to recall life without a TV in every home, and when on the first day of a college engineering class, you were given a slide rule. Consequently, I am also old enough to remember a time when being “opinionated” was considered a negative human quality.

But, being “opinionated” helps us build authority and share our perspective with others. Instead of just nodding our heads to others’ opinions, voicing and expressing our opinion can define our own identity. Also, having an opinion shows that we have the passion and skill to keep our thoughts on the table.

However, with today’s competing 24-hour news and media cycles, it seems as though “having an opinion” and easily “available platforms” to reach millions of people around the globe, is?increasingly fashionable and amazingly profitable.?

As I was being bombarded by this week’s most important news [from the possibility of the start of a World War III to the appointment of the first African American woman to serve on the U.S. Supreme Court], I found myself, in hindsight, wondering how many of the hundreds of important decisions I made as a Fortune 100 executive, were based on facts and knowledge versus my opinion; and what were the consequences of the decisions I made simply based on my opinion or my judgment.

Then, as I thought about it more deeply, I began to realize that decisions made by leaders or those in power, based on opinions driven by cultural beliefs, partisanship and/or poor judgment --- instead of facts, knowledge and fairness --- could result in significantly different outcomes and unintended consequences.

But, when are opinions okay? and should we ever be judgmental?

When Are Opinions Okay?

I am sure that most of us would agree that the two words possessing the most relativity in the English language is “right” and “wrong.” In the simplest form, when something or someone is thought to be “right” or “wrong,” the justification for either is an opinion.

When a set of opinions becomes organizational rules, sanctioned by organizational leadership, they become “practices,” which are considered necessary to accomplish the organization’s mission morally, competitively, and legally.

When a set of opinions becomes enforced policy, established by governmental officials, they become “laws,” which are considered necessary to accomplish the government’s role of orderly oversight and the protection of its constituency.

In both cases, facts, knowledge and the perceived outcomes are heavily weighted in the consideration.

However, when our individual opinions become “personal judgements,” based simply on our beliefs, partisanship, prejudices, position or misinformation, there is usually little consideration beyond our selfishness, and the desired outcome is for us to prevent others from seeing the good that may lie beyond appearances.

Should We Ever Be Judgmental?

Many of us are often put in a position, as leaders, where we must “judge” situations and others. According to Noel Tichy and Warren Bennis, the authors of Judgment: How Winning Leaders Make Great Calls, “Judgment is the core of exemplary leadership.”

How should we judge?

I suggest in the spirit of a Compassionate Leader.

My experience and lessons-learned during my forty plus years of professional life tell me that if we judge with “compassion,” we can always be assured that most of the outcomes will be within our human ability to be just, fair, and considerate of both our motive and our organization’s mission.

Being a Compassionate Leader involves a focus on relationships through careful listening to, understanding, empathizing with and supporting other people, enabling those we lead to feel valued, respected and cared for, so they can reach their potential and do their best work.

According to Dede Henley of the Henley Leadership Group, here are three steps to becoming a more compassionate leader.

1. Listen —?really listen.?“Seek first to understand and then to be understood,” Stephen Covey wrote in in his seminal book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Compassionate leaders get out of the way and focus their attention on the people around them. They seek to understand the perspectives, motivations and roadblocks of their team members.

2. Cultivate empathy for the people you work with.?As author Sherrie Campbell?explains, in her article titled, ?7 Inspiring Traits of Compassionate Leadership, “When empathy is present, defensiveness decreases and something positive replaces it. Empathy opens doors and removes confusion. It softens the minds and hearts of others.?When people are open, this is exactly when the compassionate leader can be more creative in solving problems in ways that drive productivity and long-term success.”

3. Help make people’s lives better.?Compassionate leaders use the power of their role to lead others into the discovery of their own unique strengths and weaknesses. Your compassion can be the safe space for really courageous and authentic conversations.?

In the words of The Dalai Lama, “Through compassion you find that all human beings are just like you.”?

Ervin (Earl) Cobb?is a retired Motorola and Wells Fargo Bank executive. He is currently the CEO and Managing Partner of Richer Life, LLC. Over the past decade, Earl Cobb has been a powerful voice and passionate thought leader. His written work, presentations and coaching has provided thousands of organizational managers and those in leadership roles the guidance and insight required to close leadership skills gaps and become highly effective leaders. During this period, Earl has written and published more than ninety books and articles that have reached and contributed to the leadership development of professionals around the globe.