Lesson 12: Let The Others See The Real You!

As I sit here reflecting on my 28-year journey in male-dominated industries, it occurs to me how much time I've spent hiding behind a "mask." This mask was not a literal one, but a fa?ade I constructed to protect myself from biases, prejudices, and the preconceived notions rampant in environments where a woman in leadership is still a challenging fact for some.

Today, I share this introspection not just as a personal reflection, but as a lesson on the stifling impact of these masks and how liberating it is to finally let them fall away.

The Unseen Masks We Wear

When I first stepped into this world, fresh-faced and eager, I didn't realize I would end up adopting a series of protective guises. These masks were subtle - so subtle, in fact, that it took me some years to recognize their presence. But their effects were profound, influencing how I interacted and my confidence.

I recall a moment when someone who knew me personally outside of work made a remark that truly resonated with me. She had seen me in the comfort of my home, around my family, and noted, "You're so different at work; it's like you're another person." This observation stopped me in my tracks and prompted deep reflection. How often do we encounter someone who not only knows us well but also cares enough to offer honest, considerate feedback? It's rare, and often, when feedback is delivered in a harsh or self-serving manner, we tend to dismiss it outright. However, in this instance, I embraced her insights, reflected on them, and used them to guide my growth.

Now, with the sincere aim to assist other women in leadership positions, or aspiring to leadership positions, particularly in male-dominated industries, I'd like to offer what I believe are the most crucial indicators that you're wearing a ‘’mask’’ and share some strategies for making a meaningful change. So, let’s start:

Five Signs You Might Be Wearing a Mask

1.??? Constant Self-monitoring: You find yourself perpetually monitoring your behaviour and speech. Was I being too assertive, or not assertive enough? This constant questioning is not about refining your leadership skills; it is about fitting a mold that isn't truly yours.

2.??? Diluting Opinions: Whenever you have a strong opinion, you notice a tendency to dilute it, especially if it contradicts the mainstream view in the room. This isn’t about fostering harmony or being diplomatic; it is about survival.

3.??? Avoiding Personal Topics: In conversations, you steer clear of personal stories or passions that might pigeonhole you or trigger stereotypes, you only find ‘’safe’’ topics. Professionalism is essential, but when it costs your identity, it's a mask.

4.??? Feeling Drained: After meetings and interactions, you feel unusually drained. This isn't just the exhaustion of decision-making; it is the toll of constant pretence.

5.??? Imposter Syndrome: Despite your achievements and position, you feel like an imposter. This isn't rooted in a lack of confidence in your capabilities, or missing capabilities, but in the authenticity of the persona you are projecting.

Embracing Authenticity: Strategies to Shed Your Mask

Realizing the presence and impact of these masks is the first step toward removing them. Here are five strategies you can employ to embrace your authentic self in leadership:

1.??? Self-Reflection: Regular self-reflection is crucial. You can set aside time each week to reflect on your actions and decisions. Was I being true to my values and beliefs, or was I playing a part? This will help you identify areas where the mask is most prevalent.

2.??? Mentorship and Support Networks: Building relationships with other women in leadership can provide you with role models and confidants who are able to understand your experiences. These relationships are instrumental in helping you navigate the complexities of your career without sacrificing your authenticity.

3.??? Assertive Communication: Work on being assertive in expressing your thoughts and opinions, regardless of how they might be received. This involves training and practice, as well as consciously deciding to speak up in situations where you might previously have held back.

4.??? Personal Development: Invest in personal development, focusing on building your strengths and addressing any real gaps in your skills or knowledge. This will bolster your confidence and reduce feelings like the imposter syndrome.

5.??? Transparency and Vulnerability: Gradually, you can start sharing more of your personal insights and experiences at work. This vulnerability will help dismantle the fa?ade and encourage others to engage with you more openly and authentically.

The Impact of Letting Go

Shedding these masks is not without its challenges, but the freedom and authenticity it will bring to your life and leadership can be profoundly liberating. It certainly has been for me. I've discovered that being my true self does not diminish my effectiveness as a leader—in fact, it enhances it - and my decisions and actions have been more aligned with my true values.

As I look forward, my hope is that sharing these insights will encourage other women to recognize and remove their own masks. It's a journey worth taking, for when we let the world see the real us, we enrich not just our own lives but also those of everyone we lead.

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This concludes Lesson 12 of the "Unveiling the Journey: Lessons Learned as a Woman in the Boardroom" series.

To explore previous topics, please visit the following link: My Blog: Unveiling The Journey.

This also marks the final article for now. Looking ahead, the series will undergo a transformation, to more deeply explore challenging topics surrounding leadership and women in leadership roles.

Thank you all for engaging with my thoughts. Throughout this series, my goal has been to inspire, empower, and guide aspiring women leaders by discussing significant issues, sharing personal stories, effective strategies, and the challenges I've overcome.

I firmly believe that it is essential to continue the conversation about women in leadership positions. So, please stay tuned for what's next.

#Leadership #WomenInLeadership #Authenticity #CareerGrowth #ProfessionalDevelopment #ThoughtLeadership #VisionaryLeadership #LinkedInArticles

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