Less is More
Aravind Sithamparapillai
Financial Planning for High Earning Sales/Marketing professionals, Incorporated Business Owners, & Midwives
I took the kids to the Ontario Science Centre with my parents over the holidays. We did it on a bit of a whim after realizing the kids were old enough to start trying to carve out specific “adventures” etc. We all had a blast.
We came back to my parents’ place, and my son asked to play Monopoly. (He’s 6 so my parents have introduced him to the game).
I chose to do this on a whim specifically for a couple of reasons.
1)?????With the holiday season – my mom is off work and we have the actual time with the kids out of school.
2)?????I could have thrown in the towel and said “I have too much work, it’s RRSP season, I’ll do it another time” – but I also knew deep down that if I did that – I would just kick the can further down the road in the future.
Normally – when I do intensive kid focused days – I’m exhausted. I’m tired and frantic and stressed out about the emails piling up in my inbox, the texts or calls I didn’t answer etc.
This time around was different. When we drove home at 9:00 (Monopoly took way too long as it always does) – it was the weirdest feeling. I knew I should be stressed out, I knew that normally I would be tired and thinking about all the work the next day but I didn’t.
I felt…peaceful.
Satisfied
Content
It took me a while to realize it but (for me) it was specifically for a couple of reasons.
1)?????I didn’t feel the “pressure” to be accessible at work. I told my team & many clients I would be away. It was the holiday season so clients also were more focused on their time with family. I had turned my “out of office” on as well and in general mentally felt I had nothing to prove/worry about.
2)?????Because of that I felt focused, I remember many moments in the day, I captured many of them on camera or video but I actually remember:
Watching Ari yell to try to create sonic vibrations.
I remember taking a phosphorescent photo with my kids when there was a moment with no one in the room.
I remember trying to explain dominant and recessive genes to the kids (complete fail – 6 & 4 year olds have no idea what any of that means) and I remember watching my youngest son Asa just running around non-stop eyes full of wonder staring at all the larger than life exhibits.
Monopoly was the same. Watching Ari (my 6 year old son) practice mental math and try to negotiate a trade with me (He offered me Baltic for Boardwalk LMAO) was fun. Watching him decide he wanted to grind through the game and experience the thrills of just avoiding paying rent or the downfall of going to jail was a joy. Having Mila my 4 year old daughter sit in my lap and throw the dice – I’ve crystallized those memories.
Neil Bage from Shaping wealth wrote a piece about being present in the moment here.?In chatting with him – he strongly reinforced the point that we can only remember these moments vividly after the fact if our brain properly encoded them the first time. Being present and in the moment is vital NOT ONLY to enjoy the experience as it happens but to be able to remember and enjoy the memory after the fact.
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If I had decided to stay distracted – be on my phone more, stress about work too much, think about all the things I left undone, I would have:
1)?????Not been as present and enjoyed the moment
2)?????I wouldn’t have these memories “encoded” to look back and smile on as I write this piece.
?So what does this have to do with money or financial planning?
Many things:
I’ve written about time affluence prior (The ability to say no to things in our calendar to say yes to the right things) but this goes deeper than that.
When clients ask me about whether I would buy a rental property, or work on another side hustle or anything – I often say no. It’s not just about the additional money or the return on investment, it’s also about where my time is best suited and what do I enjoy in my life. A rental property or additional side hustles take me away from the memories I WANT to be making.
So financially – to say no to extra work means I need to be able to look at my plan and be able to say “the money I currently make & the path I’m currently on is good enough.”
For many – this isn’t an option. I don’t mean to rub that in but the point I want to make here is – if you don’t have that freedom. If your work culture is such that you can’t disconnect, if the money and time to make these things happen is difficult – those are money and planning discussions.
Do you make enough that you don’t need the next promotion and don’t need to “be visible” all the time?
If you are a midwife and you have enough saved up in your investments to compound on its own till retirement – could you take on a few less BCC’s and work only enough to pay the bills and use that time for other endeavours?
If you are self employed and get paid per project or per client – is your business revenue/profit enough that you could choose to say no to a project next month to take time with the family?
If you are in sales – do you have enough commissions in the pipeline to hit quota and carry you sustainably such that you can slow down for a moment to catch your breath?
That link is a lot more direct than one may initially think.
If you’ve got an awesome memory, if something in here resonated with you, if you have a question – drop a comment below. I’d love to hear from you and I’m here for you if you need it.
Cheers
Keynote speaker. Applied Behavioural Science. Co-Founder at Shaping Wealth
2 年Great article, my friend. Savour the moment! ??
Principal, David Cooke Wealth Counsellors Inc.
2 年Now, did you do the thing where you hold the big metal bulb and shake your head to get the crazy hair? Or have they done away with that?
Principal, David Cooke Wealth Counsellors Inc.
2 年Memories are the most valuable things you will give to your kids……