Less-Confident People Are More Successful

There is no bigger cliche in business psychology than the idea that high self-confidence is critical to career success. It is time to debunk this myth. In fact, low self-confidence is more likely to make you successful.

After many years of researching and consulting on talent, T Chaorro- Premuzic came to the conclusion that self-confidence is only helpful when it's low. Sure, extremely low confidence is not helpful: it inhibits performance by inducing fear, worry, and stress, which may drive people to give up sooner or later. But just-low-enough confidence can help us re-calibrate our goals so they are (a) more realistic and (b) attainable. Is that really a problem? Not everyone can be CEO of Coca Cola or the next Steve Jobs.

I have watched people who can barely say a word, have NO eye contact, stutter and many other reasons  lack  confidence when standing before a group.Increased confidence requires on-going practice and feedback.  I have seen many, many people change and become very confident by joining an organisation like Toastmasters.

If our confidence is low, rather than extremely low, we stand a better chance of succeeding than if we have high self-confidence. There are three main reasons for this :

1. Lower self-confidence makes us pay attention to negative feedback and be self-critical:

  Most people get trapped in their optimistic biases, so they tend to listen to positive feedback and ignore negative feedback. Although this may help them come across as confident to others, in any area of competence (e.g., education, business, sports or performing arts) achievement is 10% performance and 90% preparation. Thus, the more aware we are of our soft spots and weaknesses, the better prepared we will be.

Low self-confidence may turn us into  pessimists, but when pessimism teams-up with ambition it often produces outstanding performance. To be the very best at anything, we will need to be our harshest critic, and that is almost impossible when our starting point is high self-confidence. Exceptional achievers always experience low levels of confidence and self-confidence, but they train hard and practice continually until they reach an acceptable level of competence. Indeed, success is the best medicine for our insecurities.

2. Lower self-confidence can motivate us to work harder and prepare more:

 When we are serious about our goals, we  have more incentive to work hard.  In fact, low confidence is only demotivating when we are not serious about our goals. Most people like the idea of being exceptional, but not enough to do what it takes to achieve it. As the legendary Paul Arden (ex creative director at Saatchi & Saatchi) noted: "I want means: if I want it enough I will get it. Getting what we want means making the decisions we need to make to get what we want." If we really want what we say we want, then our low confidence will only make us work harder to achieve it — because it will indicate a discrepancy between our desired goal and our current state. 

3. Lower self-confidence reduces the chances of coming across as arrogant or being deluded.

 Although we live in a world that worships those who worship themselves — from Donald Trump to Lady Gaga to the latest reality TV "star" — the consequences of hubris are now beyond debate. According to Gallup, over 60% of employees either dislike or hate their jobs, and the most common reason is that they have narcissistic bosses. If managers were less arrogant, fewer employees would be spending their working hours on Facebook, productivity rates would go up, and turnover rates would go down.

Lower self-confidence reduces not only the chances of coming across as arrogant, but also of being deluded. Indeed, people with low self-confidence are more likely to admit their mistakes — instead of blaming others — and rarely take credit for others' accomplishments. This is arguably the most important benefit of low self-confidence because it points to the fact that low self-confidence can bring success, not just to individuals but also to organisations and society.

In brief, if we are serious about our goals, low self-confidence can be our biggest ally to accomplish them. We will be motivated to work harder, to work  on our limitations, and stop being deluded. Time to debunk the myth: High self-confidence isn't a blessing, and low self-confidence is not a curse — in fact, it is the other way around.

 Marlene Ward - is an acclaimed speaker and trainer. She shares her decades of experiences and skills to grow your confidence, persuasive communications (Spoken & Written), and to become healthier and happier. Contact Marlene for engaging and thought-provoking coaching and training.

[email protected] www.persuasivecommunications.com.au (The website is in  labour and will arrive next week).