LeoChat Series – Part 45: Practicing the Three Principal Phases of One-on-One Meetings as a Servant Leader with Professor Steven G. Rogelberg

??The Start

Professor Rogelberg: "The start is all about being sure that you have some type of lightweight agenda. One-on-ones were evaluated as being more effective when there was some type of agenda created. What was most key is who created the agenda. The more the direct was involved, the higher the ratings of effectiveness. This meeting is for the direct, so we want the direct to either come to the meeting with a set of topics they want to talk about or that we have a set of core questions the direct has either given us or provided feedback on.

We then want to start the meeting with two awesome questions. The first is, "How are you?" However, the "How are you?" question typically doesn't work but can with a twist. When you ask someone "How are you?" they will typically say "Good, great, pretty good." You just don't get much; they are automatic responses. Research shows that if you ask someone "How are you?" but answer on a 10-point scale with 1 being terrible, 10 being great, "How are you really?" now you get responses of six, sevens, fives, and now you have something to work with. You can say, "Tell me more," or you can say, "How can I help you become a seven?"

Another great starting question is to ask people, "Hey, I know you were struggling with X and you were going to try Y, how did that go for you?" When you have a question like that, people know that you're listening, making connections, and it's really powerful."

??The Heart of The Meeting

Professor Rogelberg: "During the meeting itself, while the manager is creating a structure, maybe with these core questions or the listing approach mentioned earlier, the goal is to get the direct to talk and to share. The manager has to be an awesome listener. Another predictor of ineffectiveness is if the manager talks more than the direct. The manager should say things like "Tell me more," "Help me understand," "What can I do to help?"

Managers can share perspectives but should avoid making employees feel impotent. If an employee brings a problem, the manager should ask, "What are your thoughts on how to address this problem?" Unless the idea has meaningful negative consequences, let it go. Pick your battles as a manager; if it's critical, intervene; if not, let it go. The heart of the meeting should be a free-flowing conversation where the manager prompts the employee to engage and explore, offering help and appropriate vulnerability to create a safe environment."

??The End

Professor Rogelberg: "The close has to exist and be a meaningful part of the conversation. Both parties should talk about what they're taking away from the conversation: who's doing what, recapping to ensure no one leaves wondering what was decided. End on a positive note. Find something positive to end with as we have a tendency to readily find problems, so challenge yourself to end on a positive."

Practicing the Three Principal Phases of One-on-One Meetings as a Servant Leader with Professor Steven G. Rogelberg on YouTube.

The article was written by Steven G. Rogelberg, edited by Jenny Guan. Copyright is reserved by Steven G. Rogelberg. If quoted, please indicate the source. Thank you.

Stay tuned for Part 46 of 'Leo's Fireside Chat on Servant Leadership.' To be continued.

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