Legacy Moments – The Moments That Define Us!

“The reason why the world lacks unity, and lies broken and in heaps,?is because man is disunited with himself.”?– Emerson

There are moments in life that undoubtedly change us. Nothing is ever the same again. Nor do we want to go back to the status quo.

We can invest time in assessing whether those moments change us for the better or worse. Ultimately, I've found that what truly matters is that we allow such moments to serve as a catalyst to move us forward. Better yet, these moments demonstrate our values, character, and core identity.

While I've most certainly had more than a few of these moments in my lifetime, I'll never forget walking into our office the morning of September 11th, 2001, and ending that day as a completely different leader and person. It changed absolutely everything about the way I choose to lead and live.

I arrived as a co-owner and CEO of Atrion, an information technology (IT) services company on a path of exponential growth. I considered myself a technical leader and was proud of being what I evaluated as an effective leader. To that end, I had planned on analyzing the impact and actions from our powerful, off-site leadership development event the day before.

But rather than spending my morning debriefing with our facilitator, I found myself huddled in a corner around a TV, witnessing the attack on the World Trade Center. None of us seemed to have words to speak or the ability to comprehend what was unfolding right before our eyes.

I felt utterly uncertain about navigating the terrain before me as either a leader or a human being. I had feelings and grief that I was trying to experience and manage, in addition to the daunting task of supporting fifty-three employees and their families.

I felt somewhat exposed – nothing in my life or career had prepared me for this. There wasn't a manual to consult, nor were there policies and procedures I could reference. The buck stopped with me and my subsequent actions.

I was a zombie driving home that evening. I was looking for a life raft to hold onto to weather the storm. I can honestly say that I didn't sleep at all that night. Because all I could think of was how this moment would test me and my limits. Could I rise to the occasion and be the leader called for at this moment? So, I started redefining my role as a leader during this unguarded moment.

Suddenly, my tactical and numbers-driven focus wouldn't be enough to steer us effectively to the other side of this. Offering inspiring, cliché-like words wouldn't work because I had no wisdom for what we witnessed.

Instead, I needed to be open and honest with myself AND others. I was swimming in new and uncharted waters. I needed to be a source of strength while being vulnerable and authentic. I needed to provide clarity and direction while inspiring my team to change the company's essence. I needed to balance being the life raft others held onto while having my own experience.

Would this be a defining moment—my defining moment? For sure! The next day, I stood before my employees and shared my vision of how we would prevail through this challenge. I was open, honest, vulnerable, and inspirational. Yes, there would be twists and turns, but we would get through this moment.

In this new and uncharted territory, I discovered the connections between decisive, defining, and unguarded moments, which I called Legacy Moments. By being willing to access my inward, unguarded space, I was able to be present to make critical decisions while also defining the type of leader I would become.

As this leadership transformation occurred, three types of Legacy Moments quickly emerged from the chaos of the circumstances – decisive, defining, and unguarded.

·??????? Decisive moments – Leaders always have these moments; decisions must be made daily, hourly, and sometimes minute-by-minute. They are the proverbial "fork in the road" where everything that comes after a decision is altered due to our choice.

·??????? Defining moments—Our decisions drive our actions, which create results and ultimately define the leaders. Our actions reveal our character and values and show others what we are made of and what we represent.

·??????? Unguarded moments - It is often in solitude and silence that leaders can tap into a deeper part of themselves and allow the deepest core of who they are to arise. Unguarded moments are when our authentic, innermost self speaks, and we are quiet enough to listen and hear the wisdom from a place that isn't necessarily entrenched in looking at the numbers, results, or data. These moments are the gateway to standing solidly in decisive and defining moments requiring us to tap into an inner knowing.

Being open and honest with myself and the employees meant I had to spend a lot of time in unguarded moments to clarify how I would stand in the middle of the uncertainty we were experiencing. Accessing knowledge and wisdom meant I had to stay present and vigilant about what I now refer to as "inner authority" – a profound, unshakable clarity about who I am and what I value.

Unguarded moments allowed me to discover my "internal compass," which helped me make decisions as swiftly as possible to support my employees and hope that we could survive the impact of September 11th as a company and as fellow human beings.

As I navigated the following weeks and months, I realized that being an Intentional Leader was an entirely different level. It was far above and beyond anything I had ever experienced. I was a manager, but the situation required me to become a leader. I realized we often use these words (titles) interchangeably. I have often used these words interchangeably myself—however, they are NOT the same.

While I continued to have a manager-level focus on our goals, numbers, and metrics, September 11th was anything but status quo. It required an intense leadership focus on building relationships, uplifting people, and creating new ways of relating with our clients and each other. Intentional leadership requires flexibility to adapt and innovate while fostering growth and development. These were steps ahead of typical management, which focused on the details while keeping things stable.

I didn't have the luxury of being solely reactive and transactional, which is often the manager's role. This new space meant I had to be responsive, transformational, positive, inclusive, and in ALL directions—with myself, our employees, and our clients.

What I found was that leadership and management go hand in hand. Before September 11th, I was all manager and operated with little leadership. My decisive moment was deciding to flip that equation around and show up as a leader first and foremost. And I knew we wouldn't survive without both.

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Throughout the experience of leading Atrion through the many ripple effects of September 11th, I realized that a single moment of awareness can shape our personal and leadership journeys.

Despite the chaos of the circumstances, I was aware enough to know that I needed to invest in solitude and quiet to tap into a deeper part of myself as a leader. I needed to transcend managing the ship we were all on together. Instead of primarily focusing on the leaks and reacting to what threats may be present or lurking ahead, I needed to lead and proactively chart our course by tapping into the inner clarity of my authentic self.

Without this critical moment of self-awareness (and many more such moments to follow), we would've most likely been "dead in the water."

Unfortunately, as an experienced leader, most leaders haven't developed their internal compass. They haven't or are unwilling to inhabit their unguarded moments and strengthen their inner authority. The habit of self-reflection is missing, impacting their ability to stand firmly and powerfully during decisive and defining moments for themselves, their companies, and their communities.

While I certainly hope never to see an event of the magnitude of September 11th, I know that it has forever elevated my leadership and my humanity for the better. I have united within myself through the reflection that unguarded moments have allowed me, and I know this is possible on a much larger scale if we choose to be intentional leaders at our core.

So, in light of our companies and communities calling us to stand up, I ask you this: will you answer the call? What will be your September 11th moment? What will it take for you to become an intentional leader?

Tim Hebert

Tim Hebert sees the world differently. As a perennial entrepreneur, leadership activator, community innovator, keynote speaker, and author, he’s committed to finding the untapped potential—and helping others do the same. Tim Hebert is the author of?The Intentional Leader from which this article is adapted.