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As I perused my feed, I pondered the negative impacts of a toxic work environment on employees, including myself. As an introvert, my quietness is often misunderstood. In the past, before relocating to the United States, I freely expressed my views. However, due to trauma, office politics, and specific incidents, I've resorted to silence. Adapting to the expectations in a setting devoid of normalcy presents a significant challenge.

From the past. I specialize in negotiation, having thrived in a male-dominated industry that was inclusive to all, regardless of tenure or experience level. My knowledge may not extend to procurement materials or marketing, yet I found my niche instinctively. I've interacted with engineers, overseen programs, and chaired progress meetings, even though I'm not an engineer. I secured a major project in Asia in my twenties, but its significance only dawned on me after relocating. The project, involving constructing an operational transit system, was high-profile and contentious. It demanded considerable persuasion and negotiation skills, which I still take pride in. When in Manila, I never miss a ride on Skyway I. Its inauguration, graced by the Philippine president and international delegates, was memorable, and I was present. That experience taught me that technical knowledge could be learned with engineers' mentorship. They supported me during negotiations with technical insights like material statistics and capacities. Although I could discuss these to a degree, I left the intricate engineering details to the more eloquent experts. I have successfully concluded multiple projects that our engineers or architects hadn't managed to complete.

Once the projects were finished, I transitioned to marketing and succeeded numerous times.

After moving to the US, I was in a vastly different environment. The expatriates I met were not like those back home. As a result, I advocate for the Psychological Safety Act and a firm no-bullying policy at work. My experiences have been distressing as I've suffered silently, valuing transparency while enduring ongoing bullying and gaslighting. Unfortunately, I could not secure a job similar to my previous one. It appears that the position I left is reserved for the privileged. I've lost count of the applications I've submitted, only to be told they found someone more suitable. Despite meeting the advertised requirements, it never seems to be enough. Therefore, I decided to make a career change to healthcare.

I transitioned to the healthcare field and began working in behavioral health, where I was introduced to the developmentally disabled population. I was deeply drawn to this job because of how fragile they are and how their rights were frequently violated by the institutions that promised to take care of them.

The behavioral health industry is tricky for those contracting with the state or regional centers. Most big corporations or small businesses often fail to practice what the regulations expect of them. They only learn when a whistleblower or annual inspections catch them.

Witnessing this repeatedly has been distressing. With my background in vendor relations and regional center regulations, silence is not an option. Such instances make it clear that trouble looms ahead. As a mandated reporter, one has the duty to report any injustices, particularly abuse. When collaborating with vendors, ensure they are comfortable reporting every aspect of an incident, as thorough reporting is essential. However, if the vending facilities are unaccustomed to transparent reporting and operate opaquely, it's wise to strategize an exit, as the situation is unlikely to improve.

I recently left a job for several reasons, including a lack of trust. My supervisor appeared to know everything and disregarded the input of others, which made me feel that my expertise in regulation was futile and that I was considered insignificant. My efforts went unacknowledged despite guiding the facility to amend a state form to comply with client rights. Witnessing numerous violations and having no voice, I resigned rather than be implicated.

Moreover, they breached my privacy. My file had never been misplaced or stolen, except by that company. I endured countless sleepless nights, feeling as though I had been stripped bare.

I have not yet recovered from that nightmare. After numerous heartbreaking incidents, I realized that my experience in marketing and negotiation is still within me. I wanted to revisit it, perhaps pivoting back to the industry that once celebrated me as a woman with no technical expertise but who was accepted and able to prove my worth. This could be a way to heal from the heartbreak experienced in an industry where I sacrificed salary and comfort for the passion of advocacy. This time, I should focus on comfort, mental health, and personal growth.

If you've read this article, please disclose your industry, whether you've encountered bullying, and how you managed the situation without suffering trauma. Let's also focus on education to encourage support for the Psychological Safety Act.