Learning to Pivot from "No!"

What is the first word you remember?  It might be "no."  And the word "no" is etched deeply in our psyches as something to fear.  The source of the fear arises from the classical conditioning that accompanies the verbal word, "no." When we are young, the accompaniments range from a slap, a spanking, a nasty expression from a parent or teacher, the taking away of an object and perhaps a strong negative tone.  "No" is a powerful word and a word worthy of some reflection if you have any involvement in sales or negotiation.  What is the role of "no" and how can we learn to not fear it, not ignore it, but listen and ask about it and through that understanding, achieve our goals.

If you had a good childhood, your family had Dr. Seuss books on some bookshelves somewhere.  Maybe you enjoyed The Cat in the Hat.  Perhaps you liked Hop on Pop.  My favorite was, and will always be, Green Eggs and Ham.  I may not have recognized it as a book about sales then, even though I was a salesman myself.  I would get up early every morning and deliver the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette at 530 am before school.  At the tender age of 11, I was a door to door salesman pushing the Sunday and Holiday editions of the paper and seeking to expand my route.  But I surely see Sam I Am as a salesman now.  And I am not the only one who has recognized this parallel.  Some sales folks view the story as about the reward that finally comes with persistence, because eventually, the green eggs and ham are ultimately eaten and enjoyed by the target.  And the sale occurs with only 50 words (repeated endlessly though), part of a bet between Seuss and his publisher that he couldn't write a book less than 236 words (The Cat and The Hat).

But Sam I Am is a lousy listener, simply pushing his product, Green Eggs and Ham, over and over again in different ways until out of a sheer desire to never hear from Sam again, the target says, "Sam if you will let me be, I will try them you will see."  This comes after being offered them here or there, with a mouse, in a house with a fox in a box on a train in a car in a tree and in the dark.  It is a great read and is consistently ranked as one of the top children's books of all time.  But Green Eggs and Ham is a lousy lesson in listening, sales and negotiation.  Not once does Sam I Am ask a simple question, "What don't you like about green eggs and ham?"  Not once is their any effort on the part of Sam I Am to ask and listen.  Instead, his response to rejection is simply another pitch.

As I reflect on my childhood sales experiences, I actually think I modeled Sam I Am.  I remember being called persistent and having doors closed in my face trying to sell holiday editions of The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.  We were supposed to use the holiday editions to try and get regular subscribers for the daily newspaper.  It is sad that door to door selling doesn't exist much anymore.  It was a great training ground.  But imagine if Sam I Am had asked questions instead of just pushing until the target just wants you off his or her porch?

I think it would be a fun project to rewrite Green Eggs and Ham and rewrite Sam I Am so when he first asks, "Do you like green eggs and ham?" and the prospect says, "I do not like them Sam I Am, I do not like green eggs and ham" suppose Sam I Am listened and said, "You do not like green eggs and ham? Which is the worst, green eggs or ham?"  Trying to learn more about the tastes and preferences and desires of the customer?  That would be a great children's book.  

We need to unlearn our fear of "no" but not ignore it either.  "No" can be the beginning of great sales.  In the end, Sam I Am won a sale with persistence of what is seemingly a strange and hard to sell product.  Some view it as a success and kids, as I did when I was young, love it.  But as far as a lesson in listening, the book is a perfect example of what not to do.  "No" needs to lead to questions to discover what the objection is.  Get good at pivoting off of "no" and you too can sell Green Eggs and Ham - it may not even take you 50 words - because you should be asking and listening and talking less.  My favorite childhood book may hold clues as to why at 56 I am having to spend the whole year trying to be a better listener.

@cashnickerson

#shutupandsell  #listeningasamartialart #gettingtonext

 If you are following along in my listening series, you should have already read, The Only Resolution You Need for 2015, To Listen Well is To Be Like Water, Love Song Lyrics and Listening Skills, Frosty, The Taz and Listening to Introverts, How to Listen to Your Angry Boss, I am Sorry to Interrupt You, But, What Did You Just Say, Say This Not That, The Beauty of Brutal Honesty, No Notes: How to Listen and Remember Every Meeting and Sales Call, Embracing the Power of Silence in Sales and Listening for Rhythm to Negotiate and Sell.  All posts are under my profile on LinkedIn. This essay is the thirtennth in a planned series of 20 essays on listening.