Learning From Our Mistakes

This is a topic that I have very strong feelings about. I am a firm believer that we can make little progress if we do not take risks and, at times, fail.

There will always be failures along our journeys, it’s inevitable that this will happen. The learning and progress doesn’t just magically happen from failing, but from the evaluation post-failure.

I’ve read a fantastic book by Matthew Syed titled, ‘Black Box Thinking’. This book highlights the importance of being prepared to learn from our mistakes in order to grow. It’s a brilliant read and very thought provoking.

If I look back over my career to date, I’ve failed many times but those shortcomings have made me a better practitioner. I’ve never been afraid to admit when I’ve been wrong or if a session hasn’t worked and will do my utmost to improve on past experiences.

I try to embed this philosophy of learning from mistakes as much as I can when I’m coaching. I want the children who I coach to feel free to express themselves, take risks, never be afraid to make a mistake and to be open to speak about it.

I’ve met teachers and coaches who will constantly guide children to the correct answer. I would argue that this can create an environment where children are uncomfortable when making an error or mistake and more importantly, it doesn’t help the child in the long term.

We need to encourage children to be resourceful and open-minded when it comes to taking risks. When a mistake is made, can we support our children in finding a solution rather than giving them the answer?

This can stem from many different scenarios. From completing homework, to tidying, to pouring a drink to getting dressed.

Many times I’ve seen children struggling in certain situations. By pausing, reflecting and guiding them through the thought process, the majority have been able to find a solution.

This blog post was actually inspired by my 14 month old son. He’s taken his first steps over the past two weeks and of course there have been many tumbles along the way.

I’ve been quite strong minded with my family in saying that he doesn’t need to be held and stopped from falling. The house is safe and he will find a way to balance. If he falls, he’ll learn to place his hands down and be safe.

Of course I’m not letting him fall into harm's way but I’ve been blown away by how much control he has over his movements. When he loses his balance, his hands support him on his way down. He knows that he needs to go slower to have more control.

Is it because I’ve been stubborn enough to let him fail and learn on his own? Possibly, but by letting him have the freedom to move, experiment and fail, I’m sure he’s learning from his many falls along the way.

My key message is, as long as the environment is safe, let your children fail. Guide them on how to find a solution and support them in learning from their mistakes. It will help them more than you know.