"Learning from Failure: The Path to Success"

It's part of the road to success to fail. We should reevaluate our strategies, beliefs, and actions after painful events, pushing us to be better versions of ourselves. Seeing failure as a stepping stone instead of an obstacle can help us tackle challenges with resilience, instead of seeing it as a dead-end. "I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work," said Thomas Edison.Often, the word failure evokes feelings of disappointment, shame, and defeat.

This is something I know and am willing to let others know they aren't alone. There is this hilarious clip that I love, and it's an anchor talking about how Oprah was fired at 23 as an aspiring anchor. "Can you imagine firing Oprah?" asked the host. She replied to her co-host, 'That's because she wasn't Oprah. She had to get fired to become Oprah! She explains with sass. Imagine that!!

Here's my story: I got into a role that I thought sounded like an ideal fit, but little did I know that I'd be embarking on a long journey of pain, betrayal, and worst of all, I was discarded and sent back to where I came from. I never felt so broken, humiliated and alone. However I realised that it was a necessary step in my growth, and I am now more resilient than ever.

Despite my passion and positivity, I changed and started to break. My identity was challenged in order to fit in. Humor, passion, & determination are my hallmarks. Unfortunately, it wasn't accepted and I was being rejected. I felt micromanaged. I was in constant fight or flight mode. My cortisone levels were extreme and took over my existence I was chasing something that was just not obtainable, and the goal posts kept moving. I had to force myself to step back and focus on what was most important to me. I had to re-evaluated my goals and decided that the universe was speaking loudly and now it was time to pursue a different path that aligned with my values. I stopped trying to fit in, and instead embraced my uniqueness and the skills I had to offer. I know my worth, and the value I can add.

During this time I tried to confide in someone, hoping they'd hear me. I had hoped that the greater good would be on my side. That's what I needed, some support. I found out my vulnerability was used to lure me to 'mandatory counselling', and the betrayal left a very bitter taste in my mouth. I felt backed into a corner, and I couldn't escape. I just wanted to be heard, and instead I was betrayed. I knew I could not trust anyone anymore.

The person who I confided in never checked in on me or asked how I was.?(even until this day by the way ) Still gets me choked up thinking about it. I bared my soul, my fears.?Resentment and hate are the easiest ways out of this.?Maybe even blame the people who made me feel that way.?But what would that achieve? What is the purpose of that? How does it solve MY problem??These are the questions I asked myself. As soon as I realized what I had to do, I took action.?

Embrace failure, accept that my original path was no longer the right one for me.?My pain was excruciating, I was so certain that my light was bright enough to inspire people. Instead my light cast shadows, and was made dim at every opportunity. ?Even thinking about those comments makes me sick to my stomach, breaking trust while disguising it as 'we're really worried about you'.?

The knowledge I gained from studying NLP and behavior psychology enabled me to know that body language and facial expressions speak louder than words.?Despite the pain, I chose to learn from the experience and realised that I had to take a different path. I also learned to recognize and trust my own judgement in such situations, trusting my own intuition and response to body language and facial expressions.

The best way for a bully to escape is with clever words that sound friendly and caring.?Kind of like ticking the boxes and saying 'we did all we could to support'. (please)

Although the delivery is deemaning and condescending, I could see through it.?It was clear to me that I had no chance of winning this battle. I had to accept that I was powerless in this situation and walk away so I wouldn't be drawn into a power struggle.

The failure was mine.?

Even when I was micro-managed or called out by my peers for errors in my work, or when my peers looked for faults in my work rather than be a guide or congratulate any accomplishments, It seemed like I was being beaten down every day. Every day I would get back up. I still got up and showed up every day.?

In the end, however, I had to accept defeat and end my suffering, because suffering is a choice. So why should I continue to allow this to go on? Had I lost that much self-respect? I will take my sorry arse out of here. I fucken tried though, I said as I walked away. Not in those exact words... but in my mind I did. My resignation letter was to myself, and I was able to extend gratitude to myself. And I will share that in another blog..

This particular failure was essential to my growth. This is not about how I got treated by others- NOT a chance, it was about how much I valued myself worth full stop. No longer would I accept this behavior; I had regained my respect and self-worth. No more would I permit myself to be treated in this manner, and I had the courage to walk away. My resolution was set, and I knew that this failure was a crucial step in my progress and development. This was all about how much I valued myself, and not how I was perceived by others. I am grateful for the lessons I've learned and the strength I have gained.

For anyone that has been or is going through a struggle similar to mine, just know that I hear and understand you, my message is not to hate or resent. It is of hope & resilience found in failure. Making it about you and not about them is my advice. They are just messengers from the universe, just re-directing you to where you need to be...

Imagine treating Sandy that way...

To become Sandy, I had to be treated that way. (said with sass ;) )