Learner Empathy as an Act of Love

How to Create More Emotional Value for Adult Learners ... and 5 Ways to Validate Their Worthiness

We’re way overdue to stop treating adult learning as a purely cognitive endeavor.

Meaningful learning experiences in life are marked by profound emotional imprints. The most memorable moments are those filled with emotion (positive and negative). When we tap into these moments, we do so through emotional recall, somatic memory, and if we are highly self-aware, recognition of impact on our beliefs and identity. Similarly, "designed" learning experiences must take into account emotional tone, and -- to be memorable and impactful -- activate emotions.

But, wait, don't we already know this? As professionals in adult learning, instructional design, coaching, leadership development, and talent management: Haven't we been trained to know that adult learning hinges upon "emotional engagement?"

While we know that emotions can impede or motivate learning and performance, there’s a discrepancy between the theoretical knowledge that learning is by nature emotional and the ability to effectively design safe learning experiences that truly elicit the depth of emotion required to make learning memorable and impactful. Why? Because emotions are slippery, subjective, unpredictable, at times unmanageable, and therefore a risky proposition for professional learning contexts.

And we frankly haven't figured out yet what to do exactly about effectively generating or harnessing emotional engagement.

Yet regardless of the delivery mechanism or the context, professional learning must be implemented in an ecosystem that is psychologically safe and emotionally valuable, not just cognitively rigorous.

If we are willing to admit that we have not yet mastered the full potential of emotional engagement in adult learning and development (despite our tossing around of the buzz phrase "emotional intelligence"), we should re-examine how we lean on adult learning theory.

Adult Learning Theory: Are We Kidding Ourselves?

Effective adult learning, according to, Knowles' and others' theories of andragogy:

• Is highly relevant and practical (HOWEVER, can we presume to know what is actually relevant or practical for each learner given baseline knowledge, demands of role, past/current/future circumstances, dreams, personal vision, and preferences?)
• Draws upon learners' internal motivation (HOWEVER, can we presume to know what internally motivates all individual learners at deeply psychological and emotional levels?)
• Is timely (HOWEVER, can we presume to know what would be timely for all learners, based on preferences and factors outside even learner control?)
• Is self-directed (HOWEVER, can we presume to know the degree to which self-discipline, personal preference, and circumstances allow for self-direction for all learners?)
• Builds on prior knowledge (HOWEVER, can we fully know what all learners' prior knowledge is, or their true level of mastery, or the best ways in which to build upon prior knowledge for each learner?)
• Is goal-oriented (HOWEVER, can we presume to know what learners' own learning, career and life goals are, beyond designer-dictated learning objectives?)

Let's be honest: Most of us actually do not have sufficient insight/data into (hence real control over) these factors that we know make learning especially memorable and impactful. In fact, many of us don't even have direct access to our learners at all.

Yet we move, overconfidently, through design processes built on a foundation of unanswered questions, assumptions, and hopes.

Deepening Our Empathetic Understanding of Our Learners

When we talk about empathy in learning design, we are typically referring to identifying with learner perspective for instructor-led training, blended learning, or educational technology design: using human-centered approaches to (attempt to) address learner/user needs, desires, attitudes, and fears with design and technology solutions -- driving to a desired learning/behavioral outcome.

If we are to glean more insight into the questions that adult learning theory poses (about relevance, motivation, self-direction, goal orientation, etc.), we must understand that we are on a Quest of Empathy to better know our learners from a deeply personal, emotional perspective.

Here are some ways we can do that:

Gain Deep Contextual Insight. If your budget or timeline has you rushing through needs analysis to "get to the meat of the work" (aka Design), you're not alone. But it's critical that we make heavy investments both upfront and on an ongoing basis, using the right tools and approaches, to analyze, assess and empathize with our learners. This means: talking to learners directly; deepening and broadening our learner research; conducting more robust front end analysis, root cause analysis, and performance analysis to edge into the corners and nuances of learner motivation, learning environments, common misconceptions, and exemplary performance. We can't empathize with something we don't truly understand.

Use Storytelling to Better Understand Learners. Developing Learner Personas and Learner Stories can allow us to translate theoretical understanding into specific, diverse personas living out realistic scenarios, derived from empathetic lensing. This helps avoid over-characterizing or homogenizing all learners into a one-sized-fits all model and conceptualizes our learners into real human beings, with real and sometimes conflicting feelings, thoughts, dreams, and fears. (Note this does not refer to scenario-based learning design itself, but using archetype and narrative pre-design to derive more nuanced understanding of the learners themselves.)

Leverage Tech & Analytics. If there was ever a time to leverage technology to better understand our learners, it's now. Richer, more robust analytics (descriptive, diagnostic, predictive, prescriptive) can help drive learner understanding and empathy, which isn't something that should be happening one time, at the start of the contract/year/engagement/design process. It should be happening on a regular basis via quick feedback loops with direct access to learners, learner data, and insights. (In turn, technology solutions can help personalize learning experiences, based on that data.)

Image Source: https://blog.fullstory.com/use-empathy-to-build-better-products/

Beyond Adult Learning Theory: Everyone Wants to Love and Be Loved

We have grown so accustomed to compartmentalizing our personal lives from our professional lives that the notion of "love" in a professional context can seem wrong, inappropriate, or flat out bizarre. Love is supposed to pertain to our personal or romantic relationships and kept separate from all other aspects of life.

However, Love cannot be removed from what the soul yearns for in every interaction, every moment, of every day.

Love is an expression of Self in its highest joy, truth, purpose, and communion. The desire for these expressions does not disappear merely because we are at work, in a training session, or taking an online course.

The question I have been asking myself, therefore, as an adult learning and instructional product design professional is this:

Why does Love matter in adult learning, and how should this impact design?

(image source: Monica Fajardo)

Designing with Love: Creating High Emotional Value for Learners

Using empathy as a strategy to push toward a premeditated outcome is far less powerful than designing learning journeys that offer high emotional value, which will in turn cause the learning to "stick." Professional learning is highly emotionally valuable if it:

• evokes Love as an expression of Self for learners in their highest joy, truth, purpose, and communion;
• validates learner worthiness and compassionately acknowledges the innate human desire to be be seen and heard without judgment or the need for pretense;
• is affective and incites positive emotional activation of feelings, attitudes, values, motivations, and enthusiasms (using negative emotional attractors only when absolutely necessary);
• is held within a sphere or under a cone of physical and psychological safety, restoring the parasympathetic nervous system to open the mind, heart, and body to safe, new experiences;
• offers practical solutions to business or relational challenges that are emotional stressors;
• and, because of all of the above: generates an authentic affiliation for and allegiance to the learning experience.

And like they say about great chefs and cooking as an act of love ... intention matters. Just as a home-cooked meal holds the energetic frequency not only of the ingredients but of the chef's magical touch, learning designers have an opportunity to infuse their own intention into learning products and experiences. To empathetically attune to learners and create real emotional value ... is to design with love.

An Act of Love: Designing to Basic Human Needs and Validating Learner Worthiness

Maslow's Hierarchy (motivational theory) introduces several layers of human needs that must be met, sequentially, leading up to full self-actualization. These layers are (in order): physiological (e.g., food, water, rest); safety and security; belongingness and love through relationship; esteem (self-worth and feeling of accomplishment); and self-actualization (full creative potential).

There is no reason to believe these needs don't need to be met, just because we are at work or in professional training. We know that tired and hungry learners are poor learners, for example. We know that trust is important in relationship-building and enticing learners to authentically and safely share as part of the learning experience. But what of belongingness, love, and esteem?

Image: Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

Thinking about learning design from the perspective of "worthiness" bridges the gap between Maslow's lower layers (physiological and safety needs) and the top layer (self-actualization) by honoring and addressing the need for being accepted (belonging) and the need for esteem (self-worth and recognition). As learning designers, facilitators, coaches, etc., we are not, of course, psychotherapists; but we can create a constructed context within which most basic human needs are being accounted for, which creates the emotional space for learning.

This is not a lensing that is typical in learning design; yet it gives us a framework for connecting deeply and directly with learners' inherent human motivators. Validating learner worthiness is both an act of empathy and an act of smart design. Here are a few ways to do that:

Validate Learner Worthiness to Claim Who They Are

Provide learners with a means by which they can know themselves better, gain personal insight, and explore the questions "Who am I? What sets me apart? And who do I want to become?" The hero's journey is one of self-regard, self-discovery, and an arc of change. Learners moving through profound learning experiences are no different.

Consider learning activities that play to learners' desire to know themselves better and stake a claim about who they are in the world: self-assessments, diagnostic tools, self-reflection tools, and quizzes -- with shareable, discussable results formats. (Here is an example of a leadership superhero quiz for school principals, based on 5 theoretical personal leadership attributes embodied in superhero archetypes, which allows learners to explore aspects of self.)

Image Source: New Leaders, Inc.

Validate Learner Worthiness to Express Themselves

Provide learners with a means by which they can share their expertise, their opinions, their experiences, their beliefs. Do this far more than not -- not only because it speaks to learners' human needs but because we know for sure by now that "sit and get" training just doesn't work. Consider learning activities that create opportunities for learners to freely express a unique view point: polls with follow-up discussions; learner-led jam sessions; knowledge-sharing platforms; physical set-up design that centers learners (for example, in a circle).

Validate Learner Worthiness to Belong

Provide learners a means by which to experience a true community in which they are accepted and in which they feel they belong. Move the learning experience from the personal to the collective, wherein every community member plays a role and belongs.

Consider learning activities that are social and cultivate belonging. Leverage technologies that offer robust online community building, such as social media. Architect clear ground rules or norms of engagement -- or, better yet, allow learners to do so. Provide space for them to define themselves as a learning community and articulate what actions and behaviors will contribute to co-creating the most inclusive and meaningful community learning experience. Think about social influence structures such as peer observation, peer coaching, and peer feedback.

Validate Learner Worthiness to Win

Provide learners with a means by which they can compete with others, compete against themselves, or win by luck/chance. Being the Best ... or being one's Best Self ... or being the Chosen One ... plays into learners' desires for esteem, regard, and acceptance. The prospect of winning releases dopamine, which is motivating and exciting. ("Am I at my best? Will I win?") Consider gamification and lottery-style activities that reward competitive status and/or incorporate risk and reward. Use Learner Personas to drive gamification design.

Image Source: Promodo.com

Validate Learner Worthiness to Create

Provide learners with a means by which they can create not only their own meaning but their own core learning experiences. Honor learners' existing knowledge and expertise as a channel to hang new knowledge through the act of creation. Allow learners to be the brains behind new content, discovery experiences, and knowledge harvesting which provide value to themselves and others. Consider learning activities that incorporate mind mapping, wikis, action learning projects, portfolios, learner-generated content, knowledge-sharing platforms.