Learn to say No

Do you struggle to communicate your boundaries? Is it hard to even know what your boundaries are? Boundaries can be challenging to set and hold, especially if you’ve been operating without them. But being able to create and maintain boundaries can do wonders for your relationship with yourself and others.

What is a boundary? Boundaries are guidelines, statements, or limitations we place on ourselves. (Such as, “I don’t answer work emails on the weekend.”) Boundaries are “I” statements. They actually help keep us close with others, as it maintains respect for ourselves and teaches others how to treat us. It helps other people around us know what our limitations are. ?

Improve your relationships by speaking with a counselor.

How to establish boundaries?

1. Reflect on your needs. Oftentimes, we struggle to communicate our boundaries because we're unclear of what our own needs and wants are. ?
2. Understand why you want to set a boundary. This helps others understand why it's important to respect your boundary. ?
3. Consistency is key. Do your best to be consistent with your boundary. But if you have a moment when you don't hold your boundary, have grace for yourself and acknowledge it without judgement. ?
4. Communicate when a boundary is being crossed. For example: maybe your boundary is not drinking alcohol on the weekdays, but your friends are pressuring you to order a drink. Communicate with them that you need to maintain your boundary. ?
5. Forgive yourself if you've been struggling to uphold a boundary! Boundaries are difficult, and they take time and practice. It's important to be compassionate with yourself and try again next time.

Discussing your needs and self-care with a therapist can help you establish boundaries.

Call us to connect with a counselor today

To your mental well-being;

Dr. Nathilee Caldeira, PhD, Founder of Let's Talk, Licensed Clinical Psychologist