Leaning In To Emotions

Have you ever had a moment where you have an emotion, and you can't exactly name what that emotion is?

This is an area of weakness for me - I can't often name emotions that aren't your standard 'sad, mad, or glad'. I know I feel other emotions throughout the day, but unless they stand out on the extreme end of one of these 3 buckets, I have trouble identifying what they are.

As leaders go, it is estimated that 90% of promotion potential is derived from affective skills such as #emotionalintelligence rather than technical skills.

90%!?!? Wow. It is no wonder that we are drawn to leaders who have the interpersonal strengths of listening, making others feel seen, and understanding the interface of our emotions and the work we do.

If you have read Brené Brown 's or Daniel Goleman 's work in this area, you'd find that our ability to connect with each other and self-regulate is deeply tied to our ability to recognize our emotions in ourselves and in one another.

The great news: you can work to develop these skills and flex your emotional management muscles in many ways. How?

1. One great way is to have a 360-degree assessment done by your team, yourself, and superiors to identify both known strengths and blind spots in your interpersonal skills.
2. Another easy to implement suggestion is to write your specific emotions down throughout the day (perhaps for a week) and determine if any patterns emerge.
3. Lastly, you can take a micro-approach of evaluating your emotional reaction to an occurrence throughout the day. How did you feel in a given scenario? What did you feel in your body at the time? How did you manage yourself through that interaction? What would you do differently next time?

I start my next 360-degree assessment today - excited to see what comes up! :)

If you're working on this skill like I am, here are a few other helpful resources:

Brene Brown's List of Emotions

Why Emotional Intelligence is Important in Leadership

Emotional Intelligence has 12 Elements: Which Do You Need To Work On?