Lean Into Resistance

I come to you with wonderful news!

You already possess a treasure map.

The treasure map will lead you to everything you want in life, including many desires you have that you don't even recognize yet.

The map uses an ingenious system to guide you. I can explain it in just three words: lean into resistance.

The mere fact that you find it hard to talk about a given subject is reason enough that you should force yourself to talk about it.

If you are hesitant to change a habit that hasn't been working for you, that hesitance is solid evidence you need to change the habit.

Resistance, in the form of your own internal reluctance to say or do something, is how you find your treasure. It is what nature uses to test whether you are worthy of finding the treasure.

For eleven years (and counting), I have had deep weekly conversations with a small handful of entrepreneurs, coaches and consultants. Over that time, I have seen that the topics people are most reluctant to discuss are the spaces in which each person has the greatest potential for growth, additional impact and a more fulfilling life.

To cite a personal example, I have been known to avoid topics that might make me overly emotional or anxious. Well, guess what? Those are the areas in which I have finally—kicking and screaming and dragging my feet—made real progress. It would have been preferable to make such progress 20 years ago, but...

Such is the nature of resistance; it masquerades as your friend, but really is keeping you away from your treasure.

I bet you have already observed friends and colleagues misunderstanding how to deal with resistance. Perhaps they make the same ill-guided decisions repeatedly or they fall victim to the same blind spots? That's the result of running around resistance rather than confronting it head on. If you can see this misguided response in others, learn from it. Lean into resistance.

Try this... play with the difference between fear and FEAR. Don't tackle immediately the most vulnerable part of your life. Instead, pick an area in which you feel a little bit of fear and unease. Lean into your resistance and do the opposite of what your inner voice is suggesting. Poke where you are a little bit sensitive.

When that works, pick an area that's slightly more challenging. Over time, you may even be ready to confront your one or two most resistant areas. That is where your treasure lies.

I am a ghostwriter (and writer) who helps you think about what matters most. You can find hundreds of stories, lessons and tools at Kasanoff.com.