Leading Through Power Struggles Without Losing Your Sanity

By Ulrika Gustafson

“Why is this person making my life so difficult?”

She sat across from me, exasperated. A high-energy, high-impact senior executive, she was used to getting things done. But one stakeholder - let’s call him Mike - was making her job feel ten times harder than it needed to be.

“He challenges everything I do. He questions my decisions in meetings. He slows things down. And my boss keeps insisting I bring him in. I don’t trust him. I don’t even think he’s fully aligned with our goals. But here I am - forced to work with him.”

Another client described a similar situation:

“I have a peer who operates in a way that is completely at odds with how I lead. He’s political, strategic, and always angling for an advantage. I prefer transparency and alignment. I’ve tried working with him, but every time I think we’ve made progress, he shifts gears and throws me off balance again.”

Sound familiar?

Here’s the truth:

?? Power struggles are inevitable in leadership.

?? Difficult stakeholders are unavoidable.

?? You can’t always remove them - but you CAN learn to navigate them strategically.

The leaders who thrive aren’t the ones who avoid power struggles - they’re the ones who handle them with clarity, composure, and strategic influence.

In this article, we’ll explore:

? Why power struggles happen - and why they feel so personal.

? How to recognize different types of power players.

? Techniques to maintain control and protect your leadership.

? How to shift from frustration to strategic influence.

Let’s dive in.

Why Power Struggles Exist (And Why They Feel Personal)

When you’re caught in a difficult leadership dynamic, it’s easy to assume the other person is just being difficult for the sake of it.

But power struggles are rarely about you personally. They’re about:

1. Competing Agendas

• You want to move fast; they prefer slow, methodical decision-making.
• You prioritize innovation; they prioritize risk mitigation.
• You believe in transparency; they believe in playing the game.

? What feels like personal resistance is often just competing objectives.

2. Fear of Losing Control

• People resist change when they feel like they’re losing power.
• They dig in, push back, and fight for relevance - even when they know change is necessary.

? Sometimes, the more resistance you face, the more power you actually hold.

3. Ego & Status Games

• Some people measure success by winning power battles, not by outcomes.
• They challenge others not because they have a better idea, but because they want to be seen as the smartest person in the room.

? You’re not just dealing with logic - you’re dealing with identity, status, and reputation.

Recognizing Power Player Types (And How to Handle Them)

Not all power struggles are the same. Before you react, you need to understand who you’re dealing with.

1. The Micromanager ??

? They struggle to let go of control and second-guess everything you do.

?? Your Strategy:

• Give them structured updates before they ask.
• Position decisions as collaborative wins.
• Show them you have things under control to reduce their anxiety.

?? What to Say:

• “I know alignment is important to you. Here’s what’s happening, and here’s how I’ll keep you informed.”

2. The Political Operator ??

? They thrive in ambiguity, positioning themselves to always win.

?? Your Strategy:

• Be three steps ahead - anticipate their moves.
• Never assume they are fully aligned, even when they say they are.
• Keep a record of agreements and key decisions.

?? What to Say:

• “Let’s put this in writing to make sure we’re fully aligned.”

3. The Contrarian ??

? They push back on everything - not because they have better ideas, but because they like the fight.

?? Your Strategy:

• Don’t take the bait. Stay calm and strategic.
• Acknowledge their concerns, but don’t let them derail the conversation.
• Redirect them to solutions, not just problems.

?? What to Say:

• “I see your concern. What solution do you propose?”

4. The Power Seeker ?

? They are obsessed with status, influence, and being seen as the smartest person in the room.

?? Your Strategy:

• Frame ideas in a way that makes them look good.
• Appeal to their desire for visibility and impact.
• Get them on your side by making them feel valued.

?? What to Say:

• “This initiative will have a big impact, and I’d love to get your perspective on how we can position it for success.”

How to Stay in Control During Power Struggles

? With Control → You anticipate challenges and navigate them proactively.

? Without Control → You react emotionally and feel constantly frustrated.

? With Control → You shift power dynamics in your favor.

? Without Control → You let others dictate how interactions play out.

? With Control → You influence outcomes while keeping your sanity.

? Without Control → You feel drained, resentful, and stuck.

Here’s how to shift into strategic leadership mode.

1. Manage Your Emotional Triggers

• Power struggles feel personal, but they’re often just business.
• Recognize what specifically triggers you and practice emotional detachment.

?? Ask Yourself:

• Why does this person get under my skin?
• Am I reacting to their strategy or their personality?

? When you understand your triggers, they lose their power.

2. Reframe the Situation as a Game, Not a Battle

• Instead of thinking, “Why are they doing this to me?”
• Think, “What’s their end game, and how can I play smarter?”

?? Strategic Mindset Shift:

• Don’t resist the game - learn to play it better.

3. Own the Narrative & Frame the Conversation

• Power players control conversations by controlling the narrative.
• If you let them set the terms, you’ll always be playing defense.

?? What to Do:

• Start meetings with clarity: “Here’s what we’re focusing on today.”
• Pre-frame potential challenges: “I know there may be concerns about X. Here’s how we’re addressing them.”

? When you set the frame, you set the power dynamic.

4. Take Power Away From Power Plays

? When they interrupt, don’t get flustered. Simply say:

• “I’ll finish my point, and then I’d love your input.”

? When they challenge you in bad faith, redirect:

• “That’s one perspective. Here’s the data that supports our approach.”

? When they try to sideline you, reclaim space:

• “I want to make sure my team’s contributions are fully considered.”

? When they try to take credit, bring the focus back:

• “Yes, as we discussed in our previous meeting, we determined that…”

? When they undermine your authority subtly, stay composed:

• “I hear your concerns, but we’re aligned on this direction.”

?? Calm. Direct. Unshaken. That’s leadership power.

Final Thought: Power Struggles Are Not a Sign of Failure - They’re a Sign You Have Power

?? If people push back against you, it’s because your leadership matters.

?? If they challenge you, it’s because your ideas have weight.

?? The goal is not to win every battle - it’s to lead effectively through them.

Now, go own your leadership.

What’s the toughest power struggle you’ve had to navigate? Let’s discuss below.??

#LeadershipStrategy #PowerDynamics #ExecutiveInfluence #HighPerformance #NavigatingConflict