Leading with Presence: Acceptance and Emotional Intelligence changes lives

In a world increasingly dominated by rapid change and high expectations, leadership often feels like a balancing act between achieving results and maintaining meaningful connections.

On one side, there's emotional intelligence (EI) - the ability to recognise and manage emotions effectively. On the other, a quieter yet equally powerful principle: is acceptance of the present moment.

We know these concepts form a life-changing blueprint for genuine connections, inner peace, and long-term success.

Acceptance (of the moment) is the Foundation of it all...

On the weekend I was playing Monopoly with my 12-year-old son, William. He loves it. He is always determined to win. My phone pinged. I picked it up to read the WhatsApp message. William looked at me and said (matter-of-factly), "Dad are you playing the game or are you on your phone?"

Let's face it, this is how we generally operate in our meetings and more. William's question to me, is a metaphor for Leadership. Leadership is about this moment, accepting life (business) as it unfolds. It's the proverbial "rolling with the punches."

And it is also about a "deeper acceptance", as Edmund Thomson Jones and I explored in The Simple Connections That Define Us podcast.

This "deeper acceptance" is embracing the "isness" of life. When you let go of resisting or demanding that situations conform to your preconceived ideal, you access a profound clarity and presence.

This isn’t passive resignation; it’s an active engagement with the reality of now, free from ego-driven expectations.

Emotional Intelligence is the catalyst for connection

While acceptance lays the groundwork for a centred and non-reactive leadership style, EI builds the bridge to meaningful connections.

High EI allows us to navigate complex interpersonal dynamics with empathy, self-awareness, and social skill. Yet in business, EI often falls prey to extremes: we either suppress emotions entirely or exploit them for dramatic effect. Think; the need to share our X-Factor story moment.

As Dr. Susan Davies highlights, with emotional agility leadership isn’t about eliminating emotions but engaging with them in a constructive and balanced way.

Emotional agility complements acceptance by enabling us to experience a range of emotions without becoming overwhelmed or detached.

The Interplay of Acceptance and EI

The principles of acceptance and emotional intelligence don’t operate in isolation, they enhance and inform each other. For instance:

• Acceptance Reduces Reactivity: When we cultivate acceptance, we are less likely to react impulsively to challenges.
• EI Deepens Understanding: Empathy allows us to understand the perspectives of others.
• Both Foster Authenticity: Acceptance of life’s imperfections and the balanced processing of emotions make us real. This authenticity builds stronger, more meaningful relationships.

So how do we integrate acceptance and emotional intelligence into our leadership style?

1. Cultivate Inner Stillness: As discussed in The Simple Connections That Define Us podcast, practice letting go of resistance to the present moment. This might involve mindfulness exercises or simply pausing before responding to a challenging situation.
2. Practice Emotional Agility: Allow yourself to experience emotions without judgment. Reflect on their origins and implications before taking action, avoiding the extremes of suppression or overindulgence.
3. Enhance Daily Interactions:
4. Balance Compassion with Clarity: Acceptance doesn’t mean tolerating dysfunction or avoiding accountability. Instead, use EI to deliver feedback compassionately while staying rooted in your core principles.
5. Create Psychological Safety: By accepting the imperfection in others (and yourself), you create an environment where everyone feels safe to share ideas, admit mistakes, and grow.

From Theory to Impact

As Edmund Thomson Jones and I explored in the podcast, when we embody these principles, we open ourselves up to a "conscious consciousness," a heightened awareness that transcends day-to-day concerns.

Living and leading in this way is true alignment with our shared human values and collective sense of purpose and meaning.

When we cultivate inner peace through acceptance and meaningful connections through EI, create greater harmony, innovation flourishes, and cultures become one of collaboration and mutual respect.

In Edmund's words (from the podcast), “The world begins to reflect the inner change we undergo.”

I have to be mindful of this when playing Monopoly with William.