Leading with Openness

Striking the Balance Between Vulnerability and Boundaries

Part 1

When I was just starting in the workplace the word “boundary” defined a specific space that had limits. For example: a fence line or the sideline of a football field was considered a boundary. I do not recall hearing the reference in terms of personal “space.” Had I understood what it meant and how to set them, it would have helped me work through a few difficult work relationships over the decades.

Currently, personal boundaries set limits on unacceptable behaviors. Each one of us may have our own set of limits and they can vary based on background, personality, relationships, and line of reporting. To have a healthy work culture, it is important to define workplace boundaries in words and actions. This will allow each person to work within those guidelines and build a culture that will flourish.

Several excellent authors have discussed workplace boundaries. Brene Brown, one of my favorites, has a unique approach in her book “Dare to Lead.” She places the responsibility of setting boundaries on leaders and their workplace relationships while setting a standard of behavior for the entire team. She starts with her vulnerability and willingness to take constructive criticism. The key word is constructive. Her vulnerability as a leader has allowed her to clearly define workplace behavior by building a foundation of trust and open lines of communication.

Vulnerability as a leader is not something most of us are comfortable with. It requires us to admit our weaknesses and identify how our team can fill those gaps. Personally, once I figured that out for myself, it allowed me to find more joy in my work and significantly improve team productivity.

My first step was to realize that I do not have to have my hands in everything, and I cannot be an expert on all tasks. I had to embrace that if I have a great team, and I believe I do, I must trust them with the details. This single act of letting go of control has allowed the team to accomplish projects in record time and created unimaginable synergy. That level of trust also allows us to work closely together and hold each other accountable in a positive way.

After letting go of control, came understanding that my team is most often closer to the details than I am. This gives them a unique perspective that I don’t have and the ability to make or influence decisions in a way that improves the client experience. At first, asking for their feedback and input on most decisions felt uncomfortable, it was not how I had operated most of my career. In the end, it has made the company stronger, and more productive and client satisfaction has improved.

That said, do we have bumps in the road? Do we make mistakes? Of course, we do. The key is having the personal vulnerability to learn from them and the proper boundaries in which to communicate as we work through those bumps.

Look for Part 2 of this Thrive newsletter in two weeks. We will discuss how to define and set internal work boundaries.

It’s time to Thrive,

Jay Toups