Leadership = privilege, not a right

Last week a friend called me. She was upset - her manager cancelled her appraisal meeting yet again. This has become a habit of his as a result of which she hadn't had an appraisal in nearly 2 years! First the meetings gets postponed, then eventually cancelled. There are always "important" reasons, obviously.?

My friend is a loyal employee. She's educated with great skills, smart and ambitious. If you ask me, she's the kind of professional every company?would like to have on board. She's got options. She's also a human being - probably that "small" detail is what really gets lost so often?in today's workplace. As a person, she's got feelings - she's now questioning whether the job she's doing matters, she's feeling demotivated, unimportant, she's feeling invisible, taken for granted. Is she being dramatic or is she being led by a "leader who shouldn't be a leader"?

Today we often hear slogans that easily trip off the corporate tongue. People are our most important assets. We hire true leaders, not managers. Is this true though? The proof is in the pudding. According to Harvard Business Review, the Top 10 Complaints from employees about their leaders include:

- Not recognizing employee achievement - 63%

- Not having time to meet with employees - 52%

- Refusing to talk to subordinates - 51%

- Refusing to talk to people on the phone/ in person - 34%

Interestingly, all Top 10 complaints are centered around communication and basically not seeing another person for who they are. Not seeing another human being.

My friend's manager climbed up the ranks of his organization throughout the years. He's also smart and ambitious and he has some great technical skills. He quickly got noticed and promoted which meant he started managing teams. Like his managers before, he knew that people's leadership was a part of his path, something that he gained the right to do due to his other professional achievements.

Sounds familiar? Likely so as far too many companies have this particular career path in the cultural DNA. You work hard, you're good at your job, you stay long enough and you'll likely get a team to manage. What's worse, in many organizations?that's the?only way up. Regardless of what you know about yourself, whether you want to be a leader or not, if you want to progress and earn more, leadership?will happen to you. It becomes an expectation, a status symbol and a reward. It becomes the right of top employees.

My friend's story saddened me and inspired me to once again dream of a better world in which the leaders will lead by vocation and understand that their position is a huge privilege?and honor. It's a responsibility of great magnitude. I know my voice is not isolated. The notion of servant leadership is gaining momentum and more influencers out there are talking about empathy, leading from the heart and the importance of truly seeing another person as the key ingredients of economic success.

In the increasingly busier times, with easy access to an overwhelming amount of information, where email, Zoom and texting replace the real human touch, let's do us all a huge favor and make some conscious effort to:

1. Notice people around us - really see them for who they are, with their talents and their imperfections, with their brave face on and their insecurities - notice them and their needs and?

2. Show empathy - open up our hearts and feel what others may feel.?

3. Activate emotional intelligence and resourcefully support and celebrate each other.

4. Slow down and make time for each other to talk, to be, to listen, to connect on the human level.

5. Always assume the best intentions in others - this optimistic approach brings positivity to every day?interactions and inspires others to engage more.

6. Earn respect and trust through those human focused actions because only then it can be fully wholesome and may be complemented by other skills and achievements.?

7. Be a human being too - apologize when in the wrong, celebrate achievements with a big smile, be brave, show vulnerability.

This is especially important for people leaders as we have additional responsibility on us, that of the wellbeing and success of our teams. I however hope we can all make seeing others a habit and make this world a better place for each other. That's the dream of the Chief Soul Officer in me.