Leadership Lessons from Biking with Kids

My kids are some of my best teachers.?

One Sunday in October, we set out on what we thought was a 7 mile bike ride to meet mommy at a park near our house.?

This was to be our longest bike ride together yet, and we had a limited window to meet mommy before she drove home.?

Riding bikes with small children turns out to be a great way to think about leadership from first principles.

About half way through the ride we were losing steam. The kids were getting tired of pedaling, I was losing patience, and our ride was 40% longer than planned because mommy was on the far, not near side of the park. My previous estimates of how much further we had to go were wrong, and "just one more mile" loses its meaning when the goalposts seemingly move.

"Just one more hill until we reach mommy", was far more motivating than just one more mile. "We need to keep moving so we reach mommy and have time to play," created urgency to get us all back on the bikes after a snack break.

Lesson 1: Picking the right motivating goal and repeating it becomes so clear when working with kids.??

One of the obstacles we had to overcome was biking over a bridge.? At the apex of the bridge there's a great view of the San Francisco Bay, but it also meant we could coast downhill.? Summiting the bridge was our first big accomplishment as a team and a great time for snacks. It turned out that coasting downhill was a bigger reward than the view from reaching the top, or snacks.?

Lesson 2: Coasting. Seeing progress from previous investment with lower effort is reenergizing and a big reward.?

We covered so much ground simply by coasting down the hill, that when we found ourselves on flat ground again it was a bit disheartening. After the bridge there was a long stretch of flat ground on the shoulder of a low traffic road.? It was monotonous, but also really important for us all to be focused and paying attention to traffic.

At this point snacks and the goal were motivating, but the kids and I needed a change of pace and some help. We came up with a creative solution where I ended up helping pull my 4 year old's bike along by the handle bars, and fashioning a tow rope for my 6 year old so she could stay close and benefit from my energy.? This helped us get through this long stretch of flat ground, out of the headwind, and brought renewed energy for what was next.

Lesson 3: Plans < Situated Action. Sometimes we have to be creative about how to pull others along while providing a chance to rest.

I stopped towing as we neared the park.? Our goal was in sight, we just had to make it up and down some hills.? The kids were energized by leaving the road and getting back on bike trails. They could tell we were getting near, even though they were tired. The video I shared above is the kids in the last 2 miles of the ride pushing themselves to keep pedaling up a hill.? This section of the ride was one of the hardest physically, but more fun mentally as they could see the tops of hills, knowing they could coast down them.? We also knew mommy was near, as we were clearly in the park, and just needed to get to mommy.

Lesson 4: Seeing the results from effort can help motivate pushing hard towards a goal at the end, especially when that goal is mommy.

My 4 and 6 year old rode 9.8 miles, over a bridge, and through rolling hills.? They did it because we were prepared – we bike all the time, and because we had plenty of water, snacks, and I happen to always carry rope – just in case. They did it because we were able to manage our motivation and see that our effort was rewarded in progress towards our goal – even when the distance to our goal changed. They did it because we had a strong shared vision of biking to mommy – and getting a ride home.??

I am so proud of us.? In this motivational metaphor we are all the kids. We all need motivating goals, preparation and flexibility, creativity, and the opportunity to coast.?

Sometimes reflecting on a Sunday bike ride with your kids can be as powerful of a teacher as an annual review, or months of executive coaching.?

What have you learned from your kids recently?

How are you applying those lessons in helping you set and meet goals in 2024?