Leadership lessons from a 2 year old

They say inspiration comes from the most unexpected of places. Our linear and pre-disposed approaches of drawing meaning from the usual suspects often leads us into settling into predictable patterns of information assimilation and orienting our thinking to fit into boxes that justify our confirmation biases.

I've been spending a significant amount of my time being a part of our two year old's journey as he settles into our world, spending every living moment questioning and absorbing everything life has to offer. There are elements that often make you contemplate the nuances on how each of us approach situations from different vantage points, often ascribed to how each of us has been conditioned to react to each one of them. A toddler knows no such limitations-they approach life with a purity that the world around them hasn't had a chance to distort, a reality that is constantly being recalibrated depending on who and what they run into as they rewire their thinking and actions constantly surprising themselves and the circle of confidants around them.

?Not a day goes by without me being greeted multiple times in a day with his favorite phrase, 'Hain kashale?'. Loosely translatable into, 'what the heck is this?' As most settle into their self defined rhythms, our ability to constantly question and absorb new sources of information is often limited to what is in it for me versus being generally curious about the world around us. It limits our ability to contextualize and link patterns around us that at first glance don’t pass the sniff test. Given their lack of predisposition around what are the rules of engagement around discovery are, the amount of information a toddler soaks in and packs it for future retrieval just opens new worlds to explore, something that adults are often found reluctant to peek into. Curiosity without judgement is something that we could use a healthy dose of, and there is no other inspiration than someone who is naturally curious about everything around them.

?The other day while I was trying to cross the road to get to the other side, I found him reach out to hold my hand. My initial reaction was that he just needs the reassurance that I am here to help him get to the other side but his words and actions seem to indicate that the extension of his hand was to offer help to me as I navigated the safest way to cross the road. You see, toddlers aren't wired yet to think that we help them because they are little. They just think everyone needs some help sometimes and it is just the right thing to do. Let that sink in for a bit. Empathy is often an over abused cliché?but is such a core component of our DNA that is more evident when it comes from someone who doesn't exactly know its definition. And it is reassuring that as humans, it comes built in within our constitution.

?Toddlers aren't exactly known for discipline and for a very good reason that it limits them. If you look beyond the unpredictability around events that make up their day, they seem to have a strong preference for tasks that just have to be accomplished before they call it a day. No day begins without him greeting the morning sun and wishing the rabbits as they destroy my yard, no one goes to sleep without reading him multiple books. A ride to the park to get him sweat it out on his balance bike or a scooter is mandatory before the sun settles down. It is often reiterated that our success often is a reflection of our habits that make up our days, weeks or months and how early these form and make their impact felt is a constant reminder of the fact.

?Loyalty to the manual is not a hallmark for someone who is just trying to figure things out. Each time he opens a box that contains building blocks to create the next version of reality, the thinking muscles are play with scant respect on how things should be sequenced and structured. The only objective is to make iterative progress towards the next workable iteration of the product. It doesn’t matter if the car has five wheels or the windows of the house have blue tones in a gray background. And if things don't seem right, he has least inhibitions around tearing the whole thing down and starting all over again. But the most important thing is that he is never encumbered by the fear of starting out, all the while resetting the rules of the instruction book. True leaders are sticklers for rules but an important nuance is that they have an inclination of trusting their gut and knowing which rules can and should be broken while the manual rewrites itself. The only version of reality is the one that works and one that is constantly evolving.

You wouldn't expect someone who is barely trying to understand the alphabet to spell out gratitude but it doesn't stop them from being expressive each time they feel they are thankful for something you did for them. A heartwarming smile or that warm hug that greets you each time you help them finish a puzzle or just taking them to a dino park is all it takes to make everyone around them light up and feel optimistic about the world around us. They say leadership isn't about what you tell people to do but how you make them feel and few have mastered that more than someone who is barely learning to tighten up their shoe laces.?

?I could go on an on but parenthood often delineates leadership as we may or may not know it. And who better to learn it from than someone who is just beginning to figure it all out.?

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