Leadership Isn’t Just About Leading Others. It’s About Leading Your Own Life First.

In today's fast-paced world, leadership is often associated with managing teams, driving projects, and achieving organizational goals.

However, true leadership goes beyond guiding others—it begins with leading your own life. The concept of self-leadership is about mastering your internal world, aligning your actions with your values, and living a life of authenticity and fulfilment.

At the heart of self-leadership lies the balance between two crucial aspects of our existence: the Suit (Mind/Ego) and the Monk (Spirit/Heart).

These concepts are beautifully captured in the Life Journey Model, a framework that illustrates the journey of life as a continuous interaction between our external and internal worlds.

The External World (The Suit) vs. The Internal World (The Monk)

From birth, we embark on a journey that involves navigating both the external and internal worlds in life. The external world, represented by the Suit, is where we chase success, recognition, and material wealth.

It’s where we build our careers, set goals, and achieve external milestones.

However, as we grow older, the challenges, stress, and negative emotions of the external world begin to accumulate, leading to what many experience as burnout, crisis, or a sense of unfulfillment.

On the other hand, the internal world, represented by the Monk, is where our true self resides.

This is the realm of intuition, love, inner peace, and happiness. The internal world encourages us to embrace our emotions, cultivate self-awareness, and pursue our life purpose.

Unfortunately, the pressures of the external world often lead us to neglect our Monk, creating a gap between who we are and who we aspire to be.

The Gap: The Source of Internal Conflict

The Life Journey Model highlights this Gap as the space where negative emotions, dissatisfaction, and internal conflict arise.

This gap represents the distance between our external achievements and our internal fulfilment. It’s where the challenges of the external world begin to overshadow the desires of the internal world, leading to a life that may look successful on the outside but feels empty on the inside.

For many leaders, this gap becomes more apparent as they advance in their careers.

The pursuit of external success—climbing the corporate ladder, earning higher salaries, gaining recognition—often comes at the cost of internal peace and happiness. Over time, the unresolved tension between the Suit and the Monk can lead to a crisis of identity, where leaders find themselves questioning the true meaning and purpose of their lives.

Self-Leadership: Bridging the Gap

True leadership begins with bridging this gap. It’s about aligning your external actions with your internal values and living a life that is true to yourself. Here’s how you can start:

1. Cultivate Self-Awareness: Self-leadership starts with knowing yourself. Take time to reflect on your values, beliefs, and desires. What truly matters to you? What brings you joy and fulfilment? Understanding your internal world is the first step towards leading your own life.
2. Align Your Actions with Your Values: Once you’ve gained clarity on your internal world, the next step is to ensure that your actions align with your values. This might mean making changes in your career, relationships, or daily habits to ensure that you are living in alignment with who you are.
3. Embrace Vulnerability: Leading your own life requires courage. It involves embracing vulnerability, acknowledging your fears, and being open to change. Vulnerability is not a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of strength and authenticity.
4. Focus on Inner Peace: Success is not just about achieving external milestones; it’s about finding inner peace and happiness. Make time for activities that nourish your Monk—whether it’s meditation, journaling, spending time with loved ones, or pursuing a passion.
5. Balance the Suit and the Monk: The key to true leadership is finding a balance between the Suit and the Monk. This means pursuing external success while staying connected to your internal world. It’s about being both ambitious and content, driven and peaceful.

Conclusion: Leading Your Own Life First

In essence, leadership is not just about guiding others; it’s about leading your own life. The Life Journey Model reminds us that true fulfilment comes from aligning our external actions with our internal values.

By bridging the gap between the Suit and the Monk, we can achieve not only external success but also inner peace and happiness.

As leaders, our greatest responsibility is to lead by example. By leading our own lives with authenticity and integrity, we inspire others to do the same. Remember, the journey of life is not just about what you achieve; it’s about who you become along the way.

Call to Action:

Take a moment today to reflect on your own life journey. Where does your Suit dominate, and where does your Monk need more attention? What steps can you take to bridge the gap and lead a life that is both successful and fulfilling?

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Raf Adams