Leadership from inside out
My dear, wise and late father used to say that many of us look in our lives for a leader. And even better if, in addition to being a leader, this person is also willing to be a martyr.
He explained: a leader so that we don't have to make decisions, someone who decides for us. A martyr-leader, so that if everything goes wrong, he or she will suffer the consequences in our place.
Yes, but letting others decide for us, something apparently so simple and comfortable, hides a huge existential trap, one that will lead us - inevitably - to situations, places, relationships, jobs, and so many other circumstances in life that have little or nothing to do with us.
That is when, after 5, 10, 20, 30 years, we find ourselves looking around and questioning: how did I get here?
It's easy. We didn't master the reins of our destiny, we handed them over to others, forgetting that they, based on their own points of view and interests, have decided, decide, and will decide, for what is best for them and, often, to the detriment of what would be best for us.
Delegating to others the decisions that I need to make is therefore a very bad idea.
It is I who must first find out what my path is and then decide to follow it. And yes, to take the consequences for that decision. All of them.
?If I want to lead, I need to start by leading myself.
Not by transferring to anyone else the responsibility - the opportunity, the privilege and the right - to write every line of the story of my life.