Leaders Who Are Self Centered Always Do These 3 Things

Were you hoping to? work under the guidance of a true servant leader, only to find yourself working with a self centered leader? Let’s uncover the top three things a self centered leader will always do.

1. Self Centered Leaders Priority Their Own Needs Above All Else.? One night as I was working in my office in the middle of an important zoom meeting, I heard just outside my office, the laughter and aroma of a family dinner permeating through the air. Suddenly, my daughter peeks in, whispering that they'd saved some food for me. My mind wanders, consumed by the overwhelming question: Why am I sacrificing precious moments with my family to be in this zoom call meeting.

The very next morning, fired up from the night before and knowing I need more balance, I propose eliminating those evening meetings and instead recap our projects each morning. That idea was shot down and the relentless calls persist for weeks on end. Night after night, as my family pops in (since they live just a few houses away), I find myself frustrated and? forced to be in these meetings. I honestly didn’t feel I had a choice although now looking back I always had a choice.??

Let me ask you this: As a leader, did I unintentionally come across as "self-centered" to my family, while appearing "corporate-focused" to my company? In truth, I felt nothing short of miserable. I wanted? to focus on self-care and nurture my relationships, I found myself longing for self-centeredness.

There is this kind of dark side to leadership that we never talk about. It's time to challenge the status quo and redefine what true leadership entails.

2. A Self Centered Leader Wants Things Done Their Way.? They typically have a hard time compromising and doing things another way.

Imagine being in the room filled with anticipation and hundreds of people as a new policy is about to be revealed. This policy was a significant change, it proposed charging clients upfront for our services. Gone are the days of collecting fees at the end of the services.? Leadership announced this change without any discussion prior. Chaos took over the room as employees complained while feeling anger, fear, and the hopelessness of explaining this change to customers and to their referral partners.??

I remember one woman approaching us with her eyes filled with frustration. "Why didn't they consult us before making such a big change? We could have collaborated for solutions?" she stated. The answer to her question reverberates through the air: a resounding "No-the decision is made and there is no further discussion." The self-centered leader's agenda reigns supreme, unwilling to compromise or embrace an alternative path.

In the aftermath of this shift, an unexpected reality unfolds over the next year. Several companies crumble beneath the weight of insurmountable debt, unable to weather the storm. A possible root cause? A refusal to charge clients upfront for their services. Month after month, hundreds of thousands of dollars slip away due to a leader's reluctance to engage in difficult conversations and drive change.

Is this truly an act of self-centeredness, or can we take another perspective? Perhaps, hidden within the seemingly callous decisions, lies a company-centric motive—a desperate bid to safeguard the organization's prosperity. It really demands us to? question our preconceived notions and acknowledge that there are moments when “servant leadership”? may not be the type of leadership required to navigate uncharted waters.

It is interesting to explore the dynamics between leaders, their choices, and the far-reaching consequences they hold. As we look deeper at the power, ambition, and self-interest, we should be? prepared to challenge our perceptions and delve into a world where we begin to understand the true traits required of a leader.??

The Hidden Contradiction that we never say out loud is: The Power of Self-Centered Leadership

3.? A Self Centered Leader Is Not Aware of Your Needs.? The thing that most people don’t realize is they also may not be aware of their own needs as well.??

In our need for effective leadership, we often dismiss the notion of a self-centered leader. We assume that such leaders lack awareness of our needs, failing to realize that they may be equally unaware of their own needs. This realization opens a gateway to a much different introspection and a fresh perspective on what it truly means to lead.

How often have we found ourselves in workplaces where individuals neglect their own well-being, rushing through their days with little regard for their health? I, too, have walked that path, consumed by the desire to advance my career and uplift others, to the detriment of my own self-care. It was then that I had to embrace the concept of being a "self-centered" leader, not in the negative sense often associated with the term, but rather as an opportunity to center myself, to prioritize my own needs, and discovering a newfound capacity to care for others.

I went on a completely transformative journey, incorporating exercise and healthy eating into my daily routine. The result was amazing—I began to learn the art and discipline of self-prioritization, which, in turn, expanded my ability to serve others. It dawned on me that perhaps those leaders we are quick to label as "self-centered" possess a unique strength—a strength derived from their unwavering commitment to honor and nurture their own well-being.

If you find yourself in a leadership position, it is imperative to embrace the idea of making yourself a priority. No one else will undertake this vital task on your behalf. As responsibilities pull you in countless directions, I have witnessed relationships crumble, health deteriorate, and finances falter—all because everything else took precedence over self-centering.

A leader who finds peace in their own centeredness gains immeasurable capacity to guide, mentor, and inspire. They can actively engage in life's wonders, love themselves, and extend that love to others. With a strong foundation of self-centeredness, they possess the confidence to make difficult decisions and remain consistent in their authentic approach.

Let us collectively shed the negative connotations associated with being self-centered and embrace a new paradigm—one where we recognize the importance of prioritizing ourselves. By doing so, we cultivate the confidence and love necessary to lead others towards a brighter future. It is through self-centered leadership that we will find reserves of strength, resilience, and empathy, enabling us to navigate the complexities of leadership with grace and purpose.