Leaders who focus on being right will fail at doing right
Kingsley Grant
Helping wives better understand their entrepreneurial husbands, rekindle love, deepen intimacy, & have a happier marriage | Author: The Joyful Wife | Therapist & Coach ??? Host of the Build Your Happier Marriage Podcast
Do you know anyone - in this case a leader - who acts as if they are always right?
How do you feel being around someone like that? Do they inspire you?
Being right is important to this kind of leader. Their identity is found in being right. It makes them feel powerful and It feeds their ego.
They rarely admit that they:
- were wrong
- don’t know the answer
- made a mistake
This leader can be so frustrating to their people who feel like they cannot do anything right. Everything they do seems to be “wrong.”
I know this first hand through one of my family members.
When they’ve had one of “those” days with the boss, I often get “that” call. This is the call where they get to vent and need me to help them walk back from the edge of the cliff, metaphorically speaking.
When they begin to talk, I simply listen. They know I’m a "safe place" and a good listener who will let them vent
Here are some of the words I hear often:
- I’m so frustrated
- Tired of it
- Can’t take it anymore
- I’ve had enough
- They won't listen
- You can’t tell them - the leader - anything
- They don’t trust what I’m saying
- And on and on …
Have you ever felt that way with your leader, partner, co-worker? If so, you’re familiar with some, if not all, of these emotions.
And according to them, they’re not the only one. Others have similar complaints about this leader.
Can you imagine what it’s like to spend most of your waking hours, five-days-a-week putting up with a leader like this? How motivating is that?
Do you think my family member is going to go above the call of duty for this leader? I don't think so. Would you?
Here’s how leaders who are so focused on being right, fails.
They fail in:
- motivating their people: they do not feel motivated to do any more for a leader like this than is absolutely necessary.
- the area of productivity: this goes without saying that output will be stagnated because of “the just enough to get by" approach.
- people's performance: there will be less engagement as a result. Watching the clock will become the pastime activity of team members.
- keeping high-quality employees: my family member is one of the best and most experienced employees of the company. Had it not been for some personal reasons, they would be out of there in a hurry
- creating margin for themselves to do what they ought to be doing ...growing the business. Micromanaging becomes the status-quo as it is now a requirement to manage unhappy and dis-satisfied team-members
Failing in this manner is something a leader could avoid if they stepped back from having to be right all the time.
Some times its insecurity at play.
But it could also be a personality disorder or at the very least, not being properly prepared as a leader. They lack basic leadership skills such as collaboration, listening, motivation, empathy, etc.
Another very important skill that these leaders would do well cultivating is that of Emotional Intelligence (EI).
It's apparent that these leaders lack both personal and social competencies.
Personal competencies have to do with their self-awareness and self-management while social competencies have to do with social awareness and relationship management. All of which they are lacking.
The term that I've introduced in capturing both the EI skills and basic leadership skills is Emotelligence (Eō). Emotelligence is the art of succeeding where others failed.
Organizations that have these kinds of leaders ought to take steps to help them become better at leading through coaching and/or leadership training.
It's important that coaching or training includes elements of EI or Emotelligence.
If, after coaching and/or training, this leader continues to behave in this manner, he or she should be removed from leadership. It will be better for everyone in the long-run, including the leader in question.
What are your thoughts on this topic?
Please leave your comment below. I'd love to learn from you.
If you resonate with this topic, you would be interested in The Kingsley Grant Show as well as my talks on leadership.
Remember, YOU ARE 1-SKILL AWAY from your best hope and if this is something you want to know more about, do not hesitate to connect with me at www.kingsleygrant.com/connect.
Amazon | ISB | Indian Navy Veteran
5 年If you think long and hard before taking each decision, so that you are always right....well, you will spend you entire life on one leg. So sad, what a waste.?
Business Advisor / Consultant (Strategic Planner, Ideas to Concept Formulator & Sales Specialist)
5 年Yes, true and try to learn from mistakes
Founder | immune Inspired
5 年Well analysed Mr kingsley... I any organisation Emotelligence is the 50% skill requirement in an employee....once you identify such a person, He or she is an asset the organisation......
Quality Assurance Associate II
5 年I wrote a post earlier this week about integrating the phrase, "I don't know but..." into my vocabulary. The "...but" is always followed by an idea of how to find out. Whether it's me finding the info myself, asking an expert, or encouraging staff to find the answers themselves. "I don't know, but let's talk to Soandso about it and find out." "I don't know, but please research and let me know what you find out." Staff need to know that you are willing to provide resources for them. Staff need to know that you are willing to learn with them and learn FROM them. Our office suffered from a lack of support from our management, and I am doing my best to turn that around now. I have already seen morale improve.
Management Consultant | Coach | Author | Leadership expert
5 年Looking outwards and scanning you external environment is a part of strategy that leaders ignore at their own risk and peril. In particular, when this is about getting feedback from your own employees who perhaps have better ideas about what you are trying to get done as a company, and more to the point how to get it done.