Leaders Look Within

Chapter 4– Fight or Flight

Has there ever been a time in your life that you saw things from a fight or flight perspective? I can think of several instances in my life where this mindset was so real and it was literally tearing me down inside. I felt things were so out of my control that I was going to extremes in my mind and in action to make a difference. In all cases, it was very short-lived, but I never took the time to look deeper. I looked at it more as a transactional part of life and I had no desire to change.

What’s happening in my life right now? (September 10, 2023)

This past week I recorded the audio version of this book, “Leaders Look Within”. It took a little less than six hours to record the book. Recording the book showed me an opportunity I was not considering at first, but I kept asking myself, “Will I always wonder what I was missing out by not recording and marketing an audio format of the book.” I am thinking forwardly about the fall season and what it will bring with normal, seasonal activities at work, watching football, cooler temps and more. I am adjusting to a quieter house with my wife, Michele. We had a taste of this just prior to Covid and now it feels more real than ever before.

I am thinking about 9/11 and the events that took place. I watched a documentary and it helped me see the impact this had on so many people and their families. Tomorrow, I will pray for those people whose lives have changed.

As I write this update, I hear water in the background, and soft music playing and I am continuing to ask God to open my heart as a leader to be able to see more. I am not in fight or flight at this time in my life and so grateful. I am trying to build awareness to help me see better and understand more. It is refreshing and gets my heart pounding to want to address issues in a way that people win, we minimize risks and we continue to serve. I am grateful for this time of reflection and look forward to these times.

?Reflections for Chapter 4 = Taking Action Now

?As I wrote this article, I did so on the assumption that everyone goes through this stage in their life at one time or another. ?In order to resolve “Fight or Flight activity, I have listed some action items that have helped me deal with this issue.

Reflections = Bringing You’re a Game: Three Action Steps in Leading with Vulnerability

1)??? Don’t be afraid to ask for help.?

2)??? Tell the truth and let others know when you don’t have an answer.

3)??? Be thankful and express gratitude

Fight or Flight is real and should not be sugar-coated.

If you are in fight or flight on a more regular basis, get some help. It is not a healthy position to be in and you will quickly find that you do not have the energy to work things out and you will be spending time completely justifying your own actions.

?Tell the truth – In fight or flight, many times the truth is exaggerated. It is a time when I was super reactionary and it did not take much to put me over the top. Tell the truth! ?If someone asks something confidential or that you cannot share, make sure you communicate this position and the reason why.

?Finally, in fight or flight, typically our minds have gotten away from our heart and we need to seek clarity and more information. ?Today I write down the item I am most uncomfortable with on paper. This activity helps me process things in a more purposeful and logical approach which helps me to learn more. I can decide if it is an issue that needs attention, needs more communication, or needs a follow-up conversation.

Chapter 4- Summary - (Fight or Flight)

?There is a section in this chapter, Time, Sweat, and Blood that sums up the way I experienced fight or flight. It was my insecurity that made me go 100mph. ?My time and energy were directed 100% at my work and I did not have time to look outside of my immediate work. This insecurity was eroding my confidence and I felt like I had to learn more and go faster or I was going to fail. I was at a breaking point and it was having a terrible effect on my health and it was impacting the relationships closest to me. I was truly experiencing fight or flight. Fight or flight is real and it is intense. It is by no means healthy. I know now that I don’t want to be in that position ever again.

If you want to learn more, please check out more information about the book and download the free Leadership Guide to dig deeper and level up your own leadership game. ?https://ceoofyourheart.com/signup/

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