Leaders, exhaustion won’t make you more successful

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It’s become impossible to escape the word “burnout.” From articles to conferences, it’s a hot topic of discussion. So much so that many of my clients consider it a bad word, a cliché, or even dismiss it altogether —?especially when it comes to experiencing it themselves.?

While we may have become desensitized to the word, burnout rates are staggeringly high among American workers. This negatively affects our work, and can lead to poor performance and productivity, absenteeism, high turnover, and disengagement. More alarmingly, it is linked to physical and mental health problems that vary from headaches to substance abuse to heart attack. Whatever you feel about the word itself, burnout isn’t something to ignore in others — or in yourself.?

Work stress and exhaustion have become normalized , but it doesn’t have to be this way. Here’s how to identify burnout — and what to do when you see it in yourself.?

Spend more time thinking than doing?

Many of the world’s best leaders share one thing in common: they make time to think and learn. Warren Buffett has said that he spends 80% of his day reading and credits his time spent thinking with his ability to make good decisions. Steve Jobs was famous for his long, contemplative walks. Serena Williams (who plays great tennis and is an avid investor and entrepreneur) sets aside Monday as her “think day ” every week. While it may seem counterintuitive, time spent in deep thought is critical to our success… and no… zoning out in meetings doesn’t count.?

As leaders, we are confronted everyday with tough choices that require strategic thinking. Taking time to let your mind wander has a myriad of benefits, enhancing our problem-solving, creativity, critical-thinking, and decision-making abilities. The best, most innovative ideas won’t come when we’re exhausted. So, take a page from these great leaders and read a book or, even better, simply be. You may enjoy the experience more than you expect.?

Ask yourself: How much time do I spend thinking vs doing in a given week? What could I achieve if I was more intentional about creating space for the kind of strategic thinking only I can do??

Listen to your body?

Ask any leader how they’re doing, and you’ll probably hear “fine.” But when you get past the obligatory responses, you’re bound to hear “tired,” “overwhelmed,” or “drained.”? Many leaders torment themselves about what they “should” be doing when they have no energy to act. This was the case when I met with a client of mine, an SVP who we’ll call Alex, recently. She admitted that she feels constantly exhausted, even saying, “What if this is just how I feel forever?” Yet, while colleagues and even her therapist had mentioned burnout to her, she’d dismissed it as a buzzword.?

The truth is that ongoing exhaustion is burnout, and I often have to explain to my clients. The prevalence of fatigue in an organization doesn’t mean it’s productive; it means that you’ve got a problem on your hands. Check in with yourself every day and gauge your physical and mental energy and plan your tasks around that as much as possible. You’re no use to anyone if you’re running on steam.?

Ask yourself: What is my body trying to tell me? What do I feel capable of accomplishing today, knowing that pushing my body to the extreme will have consequences??

Be your own best friend?

There’s a common fear among leaders that if they stop working to their absolute maximum output, they’ll lose their momentum, and critical activities won’t get done. In our coaching session, Alex told me that she’s worried she’s lost her ambition and motivation “forever,” which she admits is irrational. Since she is (as many of us are) unnecessarily tough on herself, I advised her to remove herself from the equation.?

In these instances, we have to be our own best friend.

If you, like Alex, are having trouble envisioning what that looks like, that’s okay! Start by asking yourself some questions (perhaps as a journal prompt). When pressuring yourself to overwork , zoom out and ask, “Would I pressure my best friend like this? What would I say to them in this situation?” This can help you to see the situation’s reality, and act accordingly. Think of someone you know with a similar work history. Hypothetically, if they took steps to improve their work-life balance, would they just stop achieving their career goals? Would they be viewed as a failure? Would the organization collapse??

Moreover, odds are that you’d support their efforts. So, if you’d say that to an acquaintance, why can’t you say that to yourself??

Ask yourself: What could shift if I made a conscious effort to treat myself like I would a friend? What small actions could I take to achieve this??

Disconnect — and set expectations?

Most leaders have a tough time disconnecting before and after work, even if they’re ill or on a much-needed vacation. That was the case with my client, who I’ll call Erin. She feels like she must be tethered to her email and is constantly waiting for the next shoe to drop. Her company works across multiple time zones, a contributing factor. She feels anxious when she doesn’t look at a notification, AND she knows it’s unhealthy. Her phone had become the first thing she saw in the morning and the last thing she checked before bed.?

Sound familiar??

While leadership roles are demanding, it doesn’t mean that you must be “on” 24-7. In fact, it can be detrimental to your leadership . Not only that, when you cannot unplug, you set an example for your entire team, which will also negatively affect them. Studies have found that neglecting to take a break from work in the evening backfires for leaders , especially those new to managerial roles because it drains our mental resources. Leadership efficacy is actually highest on the days leaders mentally turned off from work the night before because they were able to recharge. And CEOs like Annie Tevelin have found success working a less-than 40 hour work week!

Of course, completely disconnecting when you’re not actively working may not be an option, depending on your company culture. That is the case for Erin, whose organization is known for its burnout culture. If you must stay connected, take a few small steps toward setting expectations so you’re less chained to your phone or computer. Share with your team when you’ll check your email outside of office hours, perhaps once in the morning and once in the evening, so you don’t have the pressure to respond immediately. Even if you’re reading them in real-time, this small step can go a long way.?

In my work with Erin, we tackled the issue in two parts. First, she set some limitations on when she would check in, deciding that she wouldn’t check her phone after 8:00 p.m. or before 7:00 a.m., and would set expectations for her team and colleagues around that boundary. Then, we discussed what would happen if things kept going down the same path, discussing that if things didn’t improve, she would burn out and have to leave — an important conclusion for leaders and organizations alike.?

Ask yourself: What boundaries can I create outside of “working hours” to maximize my effectiveness and personal health??

As Arianna Huffington said, “If we cannot disconnect, we cannot lead. Creating the culture of burnout is opposite to creating a culture of sustainable creativity. This is something that needs to be taught in business schools. This mentality needs to be introduced as a leadership and performance-enhancing tool.” I couldn’t agree more.?

What kind of leader do you want to be? Let’s talk about it.?

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