A Leader’s Ego; Evolve your ego to Enhance your Leadership!

The EGO… one of the most powerful little words of all time; the presence of it has started wars, while the absence of it has made men and women permanent icons of influence! Before we get into how it can hurt your leadership, your relationships, and your life; it’s only fair to pay the ego its proper respect. There are positives and negatives to everything… the positive is ego allows leaders to seek knowledge, growth, power, and the skills necessary to attain their dreams. It seems everyone could benefit from having an ego that makes them hungry to be their best selves and make the biggest impact! The negative side is when a leader is self-fulfilling, ruthless, and views the rise of others as a threat to themselves. So, whether you’re in a professional position of leadership or a leader of your personal life, how do we manage our ego to the benefit of you and the benefit of your organization, team, and others?

Manage Emotions

As a leader, we must be able to manage our emotions. It doesn’t mean you don’t have emotions… you’re a human being! You’re going to be elated at times, frustrated at times, angry at times, etc… just like everyone else. However, you’re not everyone else! You’re the one that your people are looking to for direction, tone, and action. The people that have been within your organization and life for some time will either adopt your positive pattern, be miserable due to your negative or inconsistent pattern, or choose to leave due to your pattern. Remember, your behavior gives them permission to act the same as you!

Become aware of your pattern and leadership as you ponder these questions:

• How do you enter and exit the office daily? (smiling, greeting others, eye contact, and motivate… Or, frowning, head down, exhausted, frustrated, or simply uninterested)
• How do look and how do you typically respond when frustrated?
• How do you speak about others and events?

In managing your emotions as a leader be sure to behave as if you like your job! Why would anyone ever want to be you, advance, or move up if you look so miserable doing it or if higher leadership allows it… Be sure to set the tone. Stay calm in a crisis; as your people are looking to you for necessary action and response. Teach instead of scolding; teaching builds while scolding can destroy. Lastly, positively manage your work/life harmony. Nowadays as both work and home easily spill into each other; work can become easier and more tolerable when your personal life is going great… and home can become better when work is going great. Be Mindful!

Accept Feedback

As a leader, be mindful not to let your ego resist great ideas from those you’re leading. Ego can make those in positions of leadership feel threatened when new, different, and great ideas are offered by others. Leaders are able to consume feedback and new ideas positively with the intent of building and moving the organization, the team, family, or their life upward to a new pinnacle of success. Leaders also possess the tact to successfully reject an idea because it doesn’t align with the Vision & Vision Factors to the team or organization… not because they are simply having a bad day, are threatened by a Direct Report’s rise, or attempting to protect their climb up the ladder.

At some point, your employees, team, partner, kids are going to share an idea with you and give you feedback on YOU and your style. Of course, it’s easier when they deliver the feedback in a thought-out and well-delivered manner. I hate to tell you… it rarely happens that way! Sometimes you aren't in the mood, they’re irritated and stressed and BAM… you’re right in the thick of a conversation you didn’t want to have or were ready for! So what to do?

If you can have the conversation now:

• Thank them for being passionate and willing to share their idea
• Listen
• Point out the good aspects of the idea, when there are unworkable points… Share the bigger picture of why, ask them to dedicate time to making their idea fit the bigger-picture, set a time to reconvene
• Thank them again.
• When the idea is great… use it or pass it along, being sure to facilitate the process!
• When it’s not, explain why and ask how they’d adjust the idea to fit the Vision, Vision Factor, and Bigger Picture they may not be aware of.

When you prefer to have the conversation later:

• Thank them for being passionate and willing to share their idea
• Let them know now is not a good time and set a meeting time for later in the week or next.
• Honor the meeting time you set
• Point out the good aspects of the idea, if there are unworkable points… Share the bigger picture of why, ask them to dedicate time to making their idea fit the bigger-picture, set a time to reconvene
• Thank them again.
• When the idea is great… use it!

I call this “The Leader’s Response!”. As a leader, you won’t always be remembered for everything you achieved; you will be remembered for how you responded and how you made people feel!

Train Your replacement: The Next Generation!

Too many times, leaders will allow their ego to trap them in Organizational?Quicksand. Because they want to keep their position, title, and power all to themselves they resist training their replacement… therefore they drown in doing too much, knowing everything, and cannot move up in the organizational ladder of success because no one can replace them… Self-Made Organizational Quicksand!

Leaders build other leaders; not followers! Be free of your ego and share what you know, what to do, how to do it, accept feedback, speak your people’s language, and be a model of how to lead. Enjoy your evolution!

“Leaders are able to consume feedback and new ideas positively with the intent on building and moving the organization, the team, family, or their life upward to a new pinnacle of success” – Andre Young

Written by: Andre Young

You’re a busy leader that cares about your people; the level of change they’re experiencing, their burn-out, and need for leadership training and work/life harmony skills but not sure where to turn or who to bring in… Look no further, click www.youevolvingnow.com for customizable speaking engagements and leadership trainings with Professional speaker, author, and leadership trainer, Andre Young!!! (In-Person, Virtual, or Online)