As a Leader, When Do You Make Time for Others?

During the economic downturn in the US in 2008, many of my colleagues and friends found themselves without a job. It was very common for me to receive an email from people asking to do lunch together, so that I could help them with finding a new job. I would do all I could to help as many people as possible. One day, while I was working at General Mills, I got an email from someone that I knew from business school. It was the common question on whether I had time to do lunch. I welcomed this email because this was a guy that had created a very positive impression in me while we were at graduate school. I always thought of him as being smart, talented, charismatic, hardworking, and committed.

I was not expecting that he too would be needing help to find a job given that he was very resourceful himself. I accepted because he had enough positive equity with me that I thought it would be worth the time. On the day of our lunch, I went to pick him up at the company's lobby. He was very well dressed, looking sharp. I thought to myself: "Great! This should be easy to help him find a job because he knows how to show up looking his best." We know how that can help with job interviews in general. We sat for lunch and my friend was full of positive energy. He was engaged and engaging! And then I thought: "This is going to be an easy one, because it is much easier to help someone get a job when they are enthusiastic and charged with positive energy." I really enjoyed our conversation. He told me about his job and his projects and everything sounded very positive and exciting. I waited for the line that would go something like: "However, I am thinking about a change..." But the time kept going and the line wouldn't come. Instead, he was telling me how it was going well in this job and that if things kept going that well, there could be opportunities for him for new responsibilities and an expanded role with his employer. I had had people do that with me before, that before they told me they wanted a change and needed a job, they would tell me how well it was going for them in their current job and in a number of cases, that they were about to be promoted.

His stories were very fascinating and I really enjoyed talking to him. He asked me how I was doing and if there was anything he could do for me. The time passed by and it was time to leave. The line never came up during our lunch. I figured something would come up in our farewell or even in a thank you note. Nothing, the "I would like to get a new job, please help me" line never came up. Not before our lunch, not during our lunch, not after. It never came up. The reason why it never came up was because he did not need a new job. The reason why he invited me to have lunch was because he wanted for us to check in, exchange perspectives and ideas, and he also wanted to see how I was doing and if I needed any help.

I soon came up with the realization that while many people are always busy with their jobs while they are doing well and only make time for others when they need something from other people, great leaders make time for others while they are doing well. This real story happened over 12 years ago and I still remember this high energy friend, looking great, excited about what he was working on, and making time for me to see how I was doing and to ask me if he could do anything for me. Soon after our lunch, just like he told me it was likely, he got promoted.

Up to this day, I still don't get many of those. Yes, great leaders make time for others at all times, especially when things are going well for them and they are in a position to help others. If anyone ever asked me if I knew someone to recommend for a job or if I needed to hire someone, the first person that I would have thought about to enthusiastically recommend or hire was this friend who took the time to check in with me, while he didn't need anything from me.

And you? When do you make time for others?

Dedicated to my dear friend Cem Candir. Thank you, Cem, for lunch! Please, let me know if I can ever help you with anything!

About the author:

Luis Moreno is the Co-founder of The Twin Cities Business Peer Network. He has a passion for Personal and Professional Development and reads, studies, speaks, and writes on topics related to Business and Community Leadership, Organizational Effectiveness, Emotional Intelligence, Diversity and Inclusion, Talent, Immigration, and related topics. Luis obtained an MBA in Marketing & Strategy from the Carlson School at the University of Minnesota and is a Humphrey Public Policy Fellow. He is engaged in efforts to increase U.S. Competitiveness and Shared Prosperity as a member of the Young American Leaders Program at Harvard Business School. Minnesota Governor Mark Dayton’s Council on the Martin Luther King, Jr. Holiday gave Luis the Distinguished Service Award for his contributions in the areas of race relations, justice, community service, education, and civil and human rights.