The Leader I Aim to Be

Outside of content from my colleagues, it is rare that I repost someone else's subject matter here on LinkedIn. One such post from Simon Sinek crossed my feed recently that I reposted. It was a simple but powerful message.

"Be the leader you wish you had." - Simon Sinek

Upon seeing this post, I was compelled to repost it with a downward pointing index finger and one word to capture my thoughts, "This!"

Truth be told, since seeing this simple sentence, I have not been able to let go of this notion of being the leader I wish I had. In fact, this idea has led me the think extensively about the leaders (i.e., managers) I have had over the years - from my first to my present - and whether any of them would pass the test of being the leader I wish I had at the time. A few did - 28% to be exact. This is not to say the other 72% were bad leaders. Some were. Some were not. All simply were not what I wanted or needed at the time our paths crossed. But this is not the point of this article and so I leave this to explore on a different day in a different article.

I have also given much consideration about what being the leader I wish I had means for me relative to my team and the company that I lead. I know the kind of leader I strive to be - competent, ethical, disciplined, communicative, open, energetic, focused, firm, and fair to name a few. But is this congruent with the kind of leader my team and colleagues wish they had? Am I the leader my team wants right now? Over the past few weeks, I have found myself wondering whether my colleagues would describe me if asked to describe the leader they wish they had. It is humbling to consider the possibility that what they describe may not be me.

And this brings me to the point of this article - to take an introspective dive into my quest to be the leader I wish I had. My very first article, Leadership Defined, highlighted personal attributes I have observed in successful leaders. My second article, Thrilla on LinkedIn'illa characterized two different leadership styles I have seen put to practice. Here, using Simon Sinek's statement as my premise, I describe the leader I aim to be. You will see that I focus on only three qualities - being a thought partner, an advocate, and someone who respects the talent around me. I am convinced if I get these three right, everything else will fall into place.

First, I strive to be a leader who is a thought partner.

My aim in being a thought partner for my team is simple - to try to help advance their current thinking and ideas. I try to do this by first practicing Stephen R. Covey's 5th Habit of Highly Effective People, "Seek first to understand, then to be understood." I try to ask (good) questions that clarify the situation and stimulate new ideas. I try to introduce different perspectives and interpretations of data and/or information that lead to different ways of thinking. I will sometimes challenge ideas, conclusions, and requests. I never do this to be difficult but rather to expand and enhance the conversation.

Contrary to my goal to be a thought partner, sometimes, it is necessary to ask audit questions, which tend not to be thought provoking at all. In these cases, I try to ensure I audit big and important items. In this way, I try to minimize the time sink of trivial, unimportant initiatives to keep the dialogue as meaningful and impactful as possible.

Second, I strive to be a leader who advocates for others.

As an advocate for my team, my goal is to advance their cause - be it their plan, their project, their effectiveness, or their careers. I try to accomplish this by providing real-time support, helping them problem solve, and telling their stories within my sphere of influence so that other stakeholders fully understand the value they bring.

Part of my role as advocate is to remove obstacles that slow progress and barriers that prevent success. These could be other people, defined processes, organizational systems, or even corporate policy. Sometimes this means serving as buffer so that my team remains focused on their tasks or objectives. Other times advocating may mean putting myself in harm's way to shield members of my team from outside distractions. At all times advocating means trying not to get in the way of my team's success.

Being an advocate also means being a coach, guide, and/or mentor. My goal here is to leverage my history, experience and expertise when providing perspective so as to try help accelerate personal and/or professional growth of others. This is not to say that my history is more important than anyone else's history or my expertise is more relevant than that of others, but rather to say that my experience is different. As an advocate, I try to use my different history and experiences appropriately in the way that is most meaningful for my team.

Third, I strive to be a leader who respects the talent around me.

As a leader, I try to surround myself with THE BEST talent available to me at the time I seek it. However, surrounding myself with top talent comes with responsibilities that may not exist when supervising average talent or talent that is still developing.

For example, one such responsibility is recognizing top talented individuals may be more knowledgeable and may have deeper experience in what they do than I have in their areas of responsibility. More broadly, it means recognizing I could be managing people who, in many ways, are equal (and in some cases, superior) to me in ability, resolve, and determination. Thus, in respecting the talent around me, I treat my team as equals and try to provide space that allows them to do what they do best and what I expect of them. Ultimately, respecting talent means managing to expectations and not managing the details. I leave the details to my team. For highly competent professionals, managing details will feel like micromanagement, or worse, nano-management.

Parting Thoughts

It is profound to think that I may not be the leader my team wants or needs. It's sobering, actually. Seeing the quote, "Be the leader you wish you had" literally stopped me in my tracks. It made me reflect on whether I was the leader that members of my team wished they had. It made me consider the qualities of the leaders I have had over the years. It made me evaluate the leader I am today versus the leader I strive to be.

The three qualities I share above detail what is important to me when pondering the leader I am today, the leader I strive to be, and the leader I wish I had. These three attributes may or may not resonate with you. You may have different needs. Your team may have different needs. You may be at a different stage in life and career. If this is the case, I encourage you give this real time for real thought to define the leader you wish you had and use that image to determine the leader you wish to be. For me, if I am to answer Simon Sinek's call to be the leader I wish I had, then I am a thought partner to my team. I am an advocate for my team. And finally, I am respectful of the talents my team members bring to the table. Amen!

Thank you for reading my article.?The Leader I Aim to Be?is the 29th article from Dr. Michael Edwards. If you enjoyed it, please subscribe to my Newsletter,?Leadership Explained,?to get notified when I publish a new article. Please 'share' this article with your network, click 'like', and/or leave a comment.?Click 'Follow' if you wish to follow me on LinkedIn. Have a look at my other Leadership Explained articles by clicking here.