Lead Yourself First

Leadership is probably one of the most widely used words and/or terminologies that you came across when surfing the net or reviewing the titles in the management and self-development section in a bookstore. Many dream of becoming an influential leader, and many of them do not know exactly how to become this leader. Let us start by the simple definition of leadership, that of Harvard Business School, which is “Leadership is about making others better as a result of your presence and making sure that impact lasts in your absence.”

However, can you really lead others and make such impact on them without being able to lead yourself first? I highly doubt. I do believe that the starting point should be being able to lead yourself. This requires taking control over your life, and genuinely believe that you are accountable for your success, take the decisions that count, set your goals and finally abide by your values. The good news is that these skills are learnt ones. Many can improve their self-discipline through intentional and dedicated practice. So, let us try summarizing some of the key issues that, from my perspective, may help in learning these skills.

1.    Be self-motivated. You should be able to control and motivate yourself, stay on track and do what is right. Do some effort, every day, to fill yourself with enthusiasm. Learn to boast your energy and remember that success belongs to the energetic as Robin Sharma once said in his wonderful book “Lead without a title”. Try to regularly review motivational quotes, read success stories, and connect with positive people. I recommend following a page like “SHINE” which sends you a motivational quote in addition to a 2-minutes reading article every day. Motivation is the fuel that feeds your soul and body with energy, ignites new ideas in your brain, and maximizes your ability to move forward. Nobody but yourself who can better do this for you.

2.    Self-discipline is crucial for self-development and success. I have never seen a successful man/woman who has no control over his/her time. You cannot waste hours every day on social media applications exploring and responding to nothing worthy and then expect any advancement in your life. those who “dream of success” without being organized, disciplined and having a plan, are like the ship captain who expect to reach his destination on time without having a campus and/or without fueling his engines. Train yourself to always focus on your goals and do not be distracted by short-term temptations. Start by setting your goals whether they pertain to learning a new skill such as playing a musical instrument, learning a new language or healthy life style that you want to adapt by a new eating habits, scheduled exercise hours, etc. then put a plan to do so. Remember what Drucker said one day “Objectives without a plan is just good intentions”. Divide your week into days and your days into hours and set your plan. Remind yourself that balance and knowing your priorities are so important. Give time to the things that most matters such as your health, meditation, family, friends, self-development… etc. Again, beware of wasting your time on the social media as they consume your most precious resources which are your time, emotions and energy. Train yourself to enjoy the discomfort of change as this is crucial for the development process continuity.

3.    Clean up your negative beliefs and thoughts. Your beliefs reflect your thoughts, and your thoughts dictate your deeds and your deeds determine your destiny. Every thought or idea that came across your brain generates a consequence on your mood, actions, decisions… etc. So, start by removing your negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones. Be smart in pinpointing what you have control on to work on it, and what you do not have control on to ignore and/or adapt to it. The negative feelings such as fear and doubts will be projected on your external conditions that will lead to a vicious circle of uncertainty, failure and missing opportunities for success. Robin Sharma once has a good metaphor for this that I would like to share with you. “Each one of us has a stained-glass window through which we perceive everything. This is nothing more than a filter through which we run all outer experience”. So, be careful of your “filters” that reflect the image that you see about the outer world and the perceptions that your mind realize. Simply, uninstall your failure program and re-install your success one.

4.    Little things count: If you cannot do the little things right, you will never be able to do the big things right. I do believe that the littlest things can make the biggest impact. If you are about to start a project for building your body, the trainer will advise you to start with small loads and a limited number of repetitions, then gradually increase the loads and repetitions. That is exactly what can be successful when planning for a major transformation from any sort. For instance, you can start by a 15 minutes reading every day, then increasing it gradually for the opted for one hour daily. So, you can adapt the same technique for whatever change and/or achievement you are looking for.

5.    Love yourself. Self-love should be the easiest thing in the world. But let's keep it real, it's not so easy. You should deeply believe that you deserve to live a fulfilled life. Nikki Giovanni who is One of the world's most well-known African-American poets said: “Deal with yourself as an individual, worthy of respect and make everyone else deal with you the same way.” One of the most important characteristics for being successful is knowing when to push and when to pause. So stop being harsh to yourself and treat it with love and respect.

Finally, Invest in yourself. The great transformation that is ahead starts with a decision and the best thing to do is to take it right now.

https://www.thebalancecareers.com/ways-to-build-self-discipline-in-your-life-4154296

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVbrgBjZm60

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZy1ir1otug