Caucusing in Mediation: The Mediator as Go-Between
Polly Tatum
Dedicated to putting families first and protecting the middle class by providing compassionate, comprehensive and affordable legal services in the areas of estate planning, elder law, and divorce mediation.
If the idea of sitting down with your spouse face to face to work out the terms of your divorce is nerve-racking, you may be thinking divorce mediation is not for you. Luckily, there are many different formats for divorce mediation. If you would rather work with the mediator alone, you can have caucuses. Caucusing in mediation involves two spouses in separate rooms with a mediator acting as a go-between. In this type of mediation, you and your spouse will be held apart from each other, usually in separate rooms. The mediator then goes from room to room, shuttling information back and forth between you two.
Caucusing in mediation is effective when the spouses do not feel they can be productive. A skilled mediator will know how to leverage the distance you and your spouse have between you to elicit open communications between you two. Sometimes spouses feel like the distance allows them room to breathe and to react to the negotiation process naturally if they would feel too constrained in the same room with their spouse.
It is normal to want to avoid interacting with your spouse during divorce proceedings. Maybe you are afraid of what you will do or what he or she will say. When emotions and tension run high, it can be difficult to be productive when sitting across the table from your spouse. Caucusing in mediation helps ensure productive negotiations.
The tension between spouses can be a barrier to productive mediation sessions, even when the spouses both agree to put in a good faith effort to make mediation work. Anyone who has gone through a divorce knows how quickly your emotions can get the best of you, and this can sabotage even the best-planned mediation sessions. Consult with a Massachusetts divorce mediator if you have questions about planning your mediation sessions in a way that best suits your needs and preferences. You do not need to take your divorce to a Massachusetts Probate and Family Court just because you need some space between you and your spouse. This is all too often a costly mistake. Mediation can work for you if you have the help of an experienced mediator who can act as a go-between for you and your spouse.
Do you have questions about the format of mediation? Mediation Advantage Services can help. Experienced in divorce mediation, Polly A. Tatum can help you and your spouse through the process with dignity.
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