The 'Labels' We give Ourselves

We fight to live upto the labels we give ourselves’

Ever heard of a child named?after a monster or ‘demon’ or called ‘evil’? I’m hoping not

But there are enough and more who are ‘Dev’ (king), ‘ Bhadra’ (virtuous) or after a God (Ram, Rahim, Mary etc)

Why’s that so?

Remember what our elders have always said – children get the traits from the names they are christened with. No wonder then, as soon as a child is born, we try and come up with a name that has plenty of good meaning to christen them. We want them to imbibe these traits as they grow up – and have these traits support them in their lives.

We all grow up being called by our names- we hear them a hundred times every day. They are our identities – a ‘label’ given to us. But even more than the names our parents have chosen for us, it is the ‘labels’ attached to us while growing up that have a significant impact on us.

Ever wondered why a child lovingly or in jest called ‘bhondu’(dumb), most likely displays these traits? And if we call a kid smart or ‘chatur/ chust’, that child invariably impresses with his/ her cleverness.

We become our ‘labels’ – and these are also the lenses through which the society views us. They perceive us as such and that further cements these identities.

To realise the true power of identities, look back at the time you succeeded at something. What was the identity you gave yourself that time? Remember back in school, the kid who always won the debates, always proclaimed, ‘I’m a powerful debater’. That’s a pretty strong identity and subconsciously, they became that. That’s not to say they didn’t hone their skills or work hard at it. They worked hard from a place of believing that they were meant to win.

Successful people give themselves very strong identities. A best selling author would not call themselves a ‘temporary writer’ – you’ll hear them call themselves as bestselling authors or simply, writers. That defines them. That also effects their choices, behaviours and beliefs.

Every profession has a name or a label – as that’s the identity people working in that profession take up. It impacts all their behaviours and decisions. A teacher will act for the benefit of their students – a soldier, while on the battlefield dons that identity, irrespective of their other roles.

So, what do the identities do:

1.??????They impact our beliefs about ourselves

2.??????They impact our behaviours

3.??????They impact our decisions

4.??????They impact how others view us

When there’s so much resting on our beliefs, doesn’t it make sense to choose our identities carefully? We can startegise on what to call ourselves.

I remember most of my life I said, ‘I’m an awful singer’. I was an average singer and could hum along on most occasions. But as I kept saying this, my family and friends too, started joking about it and the identity took roots. It came to a point when I couldn’t get myself to sing even two lines well.

Till a friend pointed out that by calling myself ‘besoori’ or off tune all the time, I wasn’t helping myself. She told me to switch to being a ‘keen singer’. I did that. Whenever there were songs being sung at a social gathering, I said I was a keen singer. Sure enough, I got to a point when I could lend my voice reasonably well to certain numbers!

So, now let’s see how we can make identities(our labels) work for us:

·??????The identity you give yourself helps you make your choices in life. If you call yourself a ‘fitness enthusiast’, you’re less likely to choose junk food over something healthy.

·??????Your identity is all about self-knowledge. You come to know the traits you are proud of and the traits you might want to improve upon

·??????What you call yourself gives your subconscious a direction to move towards. You will find yourself automatically choosing traits that are in line with your identity

·??????If you don’t have?a strong identity for yourself, you might find yourself drifting through life, living upto the identities given by others, hence, losing out on the ‘authentic’ you

·??????It is much easier to achieve our goals if we give ourselves a strong identity that aligns with our goals.

·??????You values are the traits that you relate with – for example- empathy, kindness, honesty etc. And these get reflected in your identity. So, your identity makes you live your values. And hence, it makes sense to choose our ‘label’ carefully and after much thought.

·??????Your identity tells you who you are. Take time to create an identity that would help you move towards what you want in life. A strong identity will also create your beliefs about yourself. So, choose to call yourself something that has an impact on your mind.

·??????Use powerful words to create your identity. A weak label will get weak results. Words have the power to move us with great momentum.

A very powerful video which tells us how our identities get created during evolution

Creating a strong identity or a label for yourself is a very powerful tool. Let’s then give ourselves a label we can be proud of – and then watch as it comes true!

?As the speaker - Wouter van den Berg says – You are who you think you are!

Do share the label you'd want to give yourself to create the results you want

(Personal Success Series)

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