Kissing up to the Boss!

In Episode 86 of the Second Shot podcast, we talked about not cutting corners, even when no one is watching and will never find out. That’s called character, and good character doesn’t allow shortcuts, even to move ahead in a job or a career. So, how does that apply to kissing up to the boss? Kissing up is a shortcut, and an article in the Journal of Applied Psychology says it can take a serious toll on a career. 

While it might seem like a good idea at first (most shortcuts look like a smart move to start with), a good boss can tell the difference between an employee who consistently gets the job done and someone who just tries to look good. So can other employees, and kissing up to the boss sends a clear message to them. It says the brownnoser is out for himself. After all, a coworker who’s willing to sacrifice his own self-respect probably won’t think twice about throwing a teammate under the bus if it means getting ahead.

What most kiss-ups don’t think about is the fact that bosses come and go. They get promoted, they get fired. They move to other companies. That can make for a cold, lonely workplace filled with disinterested coworkers who have no interest in being teammates. Most people are willing to forgive, but not many forget.

Of course, not being a kiss-up doesn’t mean ignoring the boss altogether. It’s important to have a good relationship with everybody we work with. The goal, however, should be to become someone coworkers know they can depend on. That means getting the job done and doing it right, no matter what. Being consistent and never taking shortcuts won’t always create great friendships, but it will earn respect, and that’s one of the most important things to have, at work and at home.

A good way to develop solid working relationships (and personal relationships, too) is to listen. Instead of starting a conversation with the intent of making a point or telling about yourself, really hear what the other person is saying and try to see the world through their eyes. It’s hard to create a bad relationship when you understand the other person’s perspective. It also makes kissing-up to the boss, or anyone else, unnecessary.

Pick up a copy of Ignorance on Fire: A Journey of Failing Your Way to Success (part of this article is from Chapter 27) or listen to Episode 87 of the Second Shot podcast to learn more about building good relationships and avoiding shortcuts. Entrepreneur Marzia Prince is my guest for this episode. Find Marzia on her website at www.plantchics.com.

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Heath Oakes is a Senior Territory Sales Manager for Colonial Life and Accident Insurance Company and the author of Ignorance on Fire: A Journey of Failing Your Way to Success. In addition to hosting Second Shot, he can be found on Twitter @heathoakes, Instagram @ignoranceonfire, and Facebook @Ignorance on Fire.