Kinds of Workplace Conflict

Welcome to the 3rd edition on Conflict Management tools.

Previously, we looked at the various types of conflict that occur in the workplace. In this edition, we take a look at the some kinds of conflicts that you may encounter at the office.

First, is conflict with your supervisor. A supervisor is someone who you answer directly to. This could be your department head, manager, or CEO, depending on the levels of leadership in the organization. Some of the causes of conflict between you and your supervisor may include, but not limited to: personality clashes, unclear roles and expectations, poor communication from either one, lack of trust, overwhelming workloads that lead to pressure and stress, a toxic work environment, and resistance to change, among others. Now, incase you are already a supervisor of others, your leadership may also cause conflicts to arise with those you lead if you are the source of some of the challenges mentioned above.

"Be angry, but do not ins. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry." (The Message, Ephesians 4:26)

Second, is conflict with peers. Colleagues at the office as peers. Peers can also be fellow team members, or a leaders with whom you work on certain areas together such as the management team, strategic team or even board members if you sit on a board. Causes of conflicts among peers include unnecessary competition, insecurity towards colleagues, lack of emotional intelligence, status and seeking recognition, and inadequate or poor communication among others.

Third and finally, is conflict with subordinates. Conflicts with subordinates or those you lead can be challenging and stressful to you as a leader. However, they present great opportunities to improve your relationships with subordinates. They also help you demonstrate your leadership skills. Some of the causes of conflicts with subordinates include leadership style, personality clashes, communication, failure to listen to concerns and favoritism, among others. No leader wants to be told they are wrong, or weak. However, if you are experiencing conflicts with subordinates, it may be wise to humble yourself and introspect on where you need to improve or change.

Conflicts can easily trigger people or evoke strong emotions. As a leader, it is my desire that as you read and learn from the articles on Conflict Management Tips, you will be better able to notice conflict before it occurs, and unpack conflict when you encounter it in a way that allows management and resolution before matters come to a head.

What are some of the tips you can immediately apply to resolve any one of the above conflicts, if you find yourself in one. Here are the top three tips to start you off.

1. Listen. Choose to listen and to understand, more than to be understood. Practice active listening - this is listening not to respond, and not to have a counter argument. Listen to hear what the other person is seeing from their view, where they are coming from in their thoughts and actions, why the made the decision they did. Listen out of curiosity, not to judge.
2. Emotional awareness. Be aware of the emotion the conflict is causing to arise within you. Label that emotion, and be curious to find out why you felt the way you did. When the person said or did what they did, what did you think and what did you feel? Unpack your thoughts and curiously investigate them as well. This will help to reduce the emotional charge that you generated, and help you address the situation without the emotional charge.
3. Be proactive. It is good practice not to 'wait and see' when conflict arises. Not doing anything about the conflict can cause it to simmer. It can also be interpreted to mean you don't care or you didn't notice, and in turn create a downward spiral of complex issues. If the conflict has many layers to it, you can try addressing one part at a time. This approach helps you to grow your conflict management confidence, especially when some items cannot be resolved in one session only. Let not the sun go down in your anger. You don't have to fix everything in the moment, but you can begin by simply saying 'What happened today upset me. Can we talk about it tomorrow? I feel too charged up right now to soberly attend to it.

As always, I would love to hear your comments. Let me know what your experience, challenges, or questions are. See you in the next issue! You can also DM.

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