Kids Come First?: Helping Families Cope With Separation And Divorce
KIDS COME FIRST c.i.c. Separated Parent Support and Training Workshops
Child-Focused Support & Training Workshops for Separated Parents since 2015.
The high rates of separation and divorce these days means there are many more adults and children have to find a way to deal with the emotional impact and traumatic effects of family breakdown and transitions.
The end of any intimate, co-parenting relationship can often feel like you’ve ‘lost your other half’ and, as a newly single parent, everything feels very different emotionally. The loss of the relationship triggers a whole range of emotions which can feel like being on some awful, uncontrollable roller-coaster with it’s dramatic and confusing ups & downs. And although this ‘loss-cycle’ is a necessary ‘journey’ that helps us to process the change and begin the healing process, there will certainly be times, as you recover from your separation, when you feel overwhelmed by the various stages of grief i.e. sadness, anger guilt, depression, etc.
In light of all that’s happening, it’s easy to see why a state of panic sets in for many parents and they may become deeply engrossed in trying to resolve all the impending legal and financial implications of their separation.
But all too often, this process happens at the expense of their children - who are mostly in a state of shock, confusion and emotional turmoil. Unintentionally, parents easily lose focus on how to address their emotional needs
Whilst many gradual but significant changes in your child’s behaviour may go unnoticed, you will almost certainly experience that now, more than ever, your children just can’t seem to get enough of YOU. Especially when they have to adjust to being with only one of you at a time, they will rely and depend on you to be your ‘strong, whole self’ at a time when you find it most difficult. They may find it hard to share you with their siblings as the realisation that their parents are no longer together, sinks in.
Parents are the 'planets' that children revolve around, so it will feel devastating when their entire family ‘solar system’ is thrown into some kind of crazy 'orbit'. In struggling to deal with the new ‘shape’ of their family, children of different ages will experience different stages or emotional impacts such as blaming themselves; not wanting to go to school; more tearful and sensitive than usual;?not eating or sleeping properly; unusual fears, phobias or nightmares; fighting with friends & siblings; more illnesses, etc
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With all the pressures and increased stress levels, many parents then find it difficult to maintain communications and collaborate with their ex-partner. Parents who find themselves unable to work together or agree on the simplest of things can no longer provide the basic structure & positive input their children crave so desperately. Once communication breaks down and parental mistrust sets in, the conflict may even escalate. And it’s this escalating conflict that inevitably has a profoundly negative impact on children – especially when matters end up in the Family Courts.
Kids Come First?has been providing bespoke parental support and child-focused teaching workshops?to separating parents since 2015. Our specialist guidance and advice empowers many parents to reach their own valuable agreements about caring for their children beyond separation and meeting their emotional needs.
Our?workshops are focused and geared towards helping parents keep matters out of the family courts and protecting their children from the emotional damage caused by prolonged parental battles.?Of course, we also recognise that every family situation is unique, so if you are currently going through the court process, the support and guidance we offer is equally relevant and valuable.
By examining the different ages of children, we enable parents to gain greater insight and understanding of their child's behaviours and responses; knowing what to look out for and how to deal with each situation as it arises.
We believe there is a way to continue celebrating and nurturing your children ‘together’ beyond separation!?Getting the right support and guidance, when you need it most, will help you cope well - so your children will too!
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