The keys to leadership

The Art of Leadership: Setting Boundaries and Giving Feedback

Have you ever had one of those moments where you thought, “Am I being too friendly with this new hire? Are they starting to slack off because of it?” You’re not alone—walking the line between friendly and professional is tricky business.

In my last newsletter, we talked about the importance of hiring with clarity and ensuring trust and respect are earned, not assumed. Now, let’s dive into the details, starting with two big topics: boundaries and feedback.

Setting Clear Boundaries: Friendly, Not a Friend

Here’s the truth: Being friendly is great. Being too friendly? Well, that can lead to blurred lines, favoritism, or even a complete breakdown in professionalism.

But how do you walk that fine line?

1. Be approachable but professional: You want your team to feel comfortable coming to you with issues, but that doesn’t mean you’re best buds. Keep the conversations light, but always maintain the role of a leader. No “buddy-buddy” chats that could lead to confusion.
2. Define expectations early: From day one, make it clear where the professional boundaries lie. For example, “I’m here to help you succeed, and I want us to have an open, honest line of communication. But when it comes to getting the work done, I’m going to hold you accountable.”
3. Beware of favoritism: It’s easy to become closer with some employees than others. But if one person gets special treatment, it can quickly cause tension and resentment on the team. Fairness is the name of the game.

Bottom line: Friendly doesn’t mean friend. You can still be warm and approachable without compromising your role as a leader.

Providing Structured Feedback: Clear, Consistent, and Constructive

Now, let’s talk about feedback. Raise your hand if you’ve ever had a tough time giving constructive criticism without feeling like the “bad guy.” ??

Feedback is critical—it’s how we grow. But it has to be done right, or it can backfire. So, how do you nail this part of leadership?

1. Be specific: General feedback like, “You’re doing great” or “This could be better” doesn’t help anyone. Get specific. Instead of “I need this done faster,” say, “Next time, let’s aim to complete this task in two days so we can meet our deadlines.”
2. Tie feedback to expectations: Remember those expectations you set at the start? Use them as a reference point. “When we first discussed this project, we agreed on XYZ. I’m noticing that we’ve shifted away from that. Let’s refocus.”
3. Consistency is key: Feedback shouldn’t be a once-in-a-blue-moon thing. If you wait until something’s going wrong to give feedback, it’s already too late. Make it a regular part of your team culture.
4. Make it a dialogue: Feedback is a two-way street. Ask for their thoughts and ideas—this keeps the conversation constructive, rather than one-sided.

Takeaway Action Items:

1. Review your boundaries: How do you interact with your team? Are you being too much of a friend and not enough of a leader? Jot down a few areas where you think boundaries could be stronger.
2. Schedule regular feedback sessions: Don’t wait until there’s a problem to give feedback. Set a recurring check-in, even if it’s just a quick touchpoint.
3. Next feedback session—make it specific: Be prepared with specific examples for your next feedback conversation. Make sure you tie it back to the expectations you set when you hired them.

Final Thoughts

As leaders, we often think of feedback as an uncomfortable necessity. But when done right, it can be an incredible tool for growth—for both you and your team. The same goes for setting boundaries. It’s not about being cold or distant; it’s about being clear, fair, and ensuring everyone is on the same page.

In the next newsletter, we’ll tackle holding accountability—and why it’s the final puzzle piece to creating a productive and happy team.

Until then, I challenge you to reflect on your boundaries and feedback style. Are they working for you—or against you?

P.S. Have any favorite feedback tips or boundary-setting strategies? Drop them in the comments—I’d love to hear your thoughts!

P.P.S. Keep an eye out for my upcoming toolkit on leadership communication. It’s packed with templates and bite-size tips to make your team stronger than ever.