The Key To Becoming A More Human Leader: Bringing Together Polar Opposites

In our previous post, I discussed the Six Polarities of Leadership as articulated by Andiron, a consultancy specializing in leadership development programs. If you recall, the intriguing part of this framework is that it states effective leadership (and life in general) requires navigating a set of polarities - Action vs. Reflection. Stability vs. Change. These are not truly opposites but are complementary to each other.

I’d now like to focus on the Six Polarities of Humanity.

The six polarities outlined are:?

·????? Assuredness Vs. Openness

·????? Focus On Self Vs. Focus On Others

·????? Hope Vs. Reality

·????? Take Seriously Vs. Hold Lightly

·????? Desire More Vs. Appreciate What Is

·????? Responsibility Vs. Forgiveness

We all, usually, will have different interpretations or self-assessments of where we are within each of these polarities.

Let’s take a look at a couple of examples to illustrate how such an interpretation might play out as we strive to blend these opposites:

Hope Vs. Reality

We often think of this dynamic in terms of hoping that something can be a reality. We’re relatively optimistic during that time and view the future as full of possibility.

What would happen if we didn’t have that hope and were only rooted in reality? Chances are, we wouldn’t be nearly as optimistic every time we spoke to others, even if times were fantastic. Why?

Reality can seem more grounded, but it can also be very gloomy sounding and intimidating coming from you to a group of employees. You may have a higher propensity to shut down ideas.

Conversely, what would we sound like without reality if we veered too far toward hope? The sky’s the limit, yes. But our way up sounds impractical and out of touch with the current environment in front of us. That type of naivete won’t instill much confidence, will it?

Now, let’s blend the two.

What if we could see it as continuing to build on reality with hope?

If you’re a runner, say you can run a distance of five miles. Now, can you run six miles? Seven miles? ?

The building of hope into a present reality is not about elevating from five miles to 13 or 26 miles overnight. We often make that leap from present to goal with nothing in between. That might be a trap that limits and deters us from moving forward.

Instead, when we hope to move from the reality of five miles to the hope of six miles, that new reality isn’t hard to see.

This is not about setting your projections shorter or lower at all. It’s about reaching the destination with greater intelligence of the milestone that must be met first. By connecting reality and hope, we see them as intertwined for our success. Not opposites.

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Responsibility Vs. Forgiveness

Responsibility describes ownership of a task and being reliable. Someone on your team can also share in the responsibility. However, if that team member or group executes an idea that doesn’t go as planned, you can hold them accountable for the impact of their actions.

Yet, is that all we want to do? This is also an opportunity to be forgiving and understanding in charting a new course for success with the individual or team member.

A perfect illustration of this concept? The after-action report.

The after-action report could consist of a meeting that, quite frankly, may descend into finger-pointing. What went wrong? Who did what poorly? Who do we blame for this fiasco? It’s a very judgmental, micromanaging feel to inject into a culture.

On the other hand, with forgiveness, we can help ensure the party responsible is not shamed and blamed but instead is put in a better position to learn from the experience. This consists of, among other things, suggestions on how to do it better next time. Just remember: We don’t want to be so understanding that we’re seen as a pushover that we can continue to be taken advantage of. That’s veering too far into forgiveness.

You can’t be the ultimate leader that you want to be without joining these seemingly polar opposites, one by one. There is a humanity in blending them together. Hopefully, it will also make you seem like a more approachable, more empathetic and more human leader.

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Leadership itself can feel like a constant tug-of-war between extremes. You want to focus on others but also make time for your personal satisfaction and well-being, so you don’t experience burnout or become overwhelmed. You want to be assured and confident, but you also want to be approachable rather than being seen as arrogant or defensive.

If you can blend these concepts in your mind, it very well could require help from a second perspective. Someone who can be objective and provide action steps on creating a custom plan using these Polarities of Humanity (and Polarities of Leadership).

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“Solving It Yourself” Vs. “Solving With Others” are never polar opposites when leaders work with us at Spitulnik Advisors.

As a leadership coaching and advisory practice, we’ll show you how to arrive at several ways to initially solve a problem with several opportunities for clarity. Then, we’ll collaborate on ideas you may never have considered.

Interested in learning more? Then let’s connect at 312.593.3181 or email us at [email protected].

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