Key Actions to Strengthen Your Relationship with Students. Volume 3.

We are already in the third volume of key actions that help boost your relationship with your students in class. If you have missed any of the previous ones, feel free to go back to them at any point.

In this edition, I want to focus on very simple things we can do in the classroom that, in my experience, are some of the most effective ways to build a positive rapport with your kids.

Bring Humor

If something has worked for me during my teaching career, this has to be at the top. I cannot imagine a lesson without laughter. And if I ever had one, it meant something was wrong. It is impossible, yes, hear me here, it is definitely impossible to build a great connection with your students if there is no humor in the classroom.

I am not saying this is the most important thing; as we mentioned before, respect must come first. But there is a huge difference between a respectful relationship and an awesome relationship. One of the fastest ways to get there is humor.

I always remember one of my primary school teachers, he didn’t know at the time that he would become one of my references. He would always bring a funny math problem or a crazy story into our dictations. One of the great things about it was that he did it without hesitation, and you never knew when it would happen. Everything would be formal, serious talk, and then suddenly, boom shakalaka, he would drop the bomb, and the entire class would burst into laughter.

Just remembering those days puts a smile on my face, and I can physically feel a pleasant sensation. At the end of the day, that’s what we aim for in the classroom: giving students pleasant learning experiences where they feel safe, happy, and ready to learn. He wasn’t a comedian, but his use of sarcasm and rich language made it easy for him to bring humor into the classroom.

The funny thing is, I recently read one of his posts where he talked about not being friends with students, but being their teacher. And he is absolutely right. He was fun, he was funny at times, but he was also firm and respected.

One important thing to highlight here is that we should never confuse bringing humor into the classroom with being a clown. We are teachers. We have to provide a structured learning environment with clear rules and limits. Making that distinction and never crossing the line is not only recommended but essential.

Of course, it depends on personality. For me, it comes naturally because that’s just who I am. I’m humorous in and outside the classroom. I love using sarcasm, joking around, and teasing my students. I call them bananas, melones, papas fritas, or carapapas (melons, French fries, or potato faces in Spanish). They love it. And if you set clear limits regarding respect in the classroom and among classmates, it works like a charm.

But you could bring humor in your own way. Another idea is to use funny videos or images in your resources. I’m not saying you should derail completely from the lesson, but adding humor to your materials can make learning more enjoyable. Funny activities that make students laugh and learn at the same time, or well-timed comments and jokes in class, can make a big difference. Just be careful not to force it. Don’t try to be funny. Instead, let humor come naturally.

In my experience, one of the things students value most in class is having a good time and laughing while they learn. That gives you a huge advantage when building relationships with them, plus, it’s a fast and effective way to do it. And if we look at the science behind building positive relationships, we’ll see that laughter and humor release key brain chemicals that strengthen those connections.

So, don’t hesitate. Don’t be afraid to be funny in class when the time is right. And encourage students to bring humor, too, when appropriate. It will help create the perfect environment for strengthening your relationships with your kiddos.

Keep Calm

"Keep calm and teach!" could be one of those slogans you’d find on teacher merchandise, but I see it as true advice, some of the best, to be honest.

One of the most important factors in building a positive rapport with our students is remaining calm under any circumstance. Easier said than done, right? We know how challenging it can be to not lose our temper when students push our buttons, don’t listen, or act disrespectfully. But they do because they are kids.

However, you have to be the bigger person. Not just because you are the bigger person here, but because staying calm sends a strong message of stability and safety in the classroom. No matter what happens, you are always in control, and that makes students feel safe. That sense of security sets the foundation for a great relationship with them. If students feel safe, they can be themselves, be vulnerable, and trust you.

On the other hand, if they perceive you as someone unstable, someone who loses their temper easily, they will lack that sense of safety, and that’s a huge problem. If they don’t feel safe, they can never truly be comfortable. They can never be themselves. They will never open up to a positive relationship based on trust. Instead, their brains will see you as a threat, and that will break any chance of building a meaningful connection.

Remaining calm is even more challenging during stressful periods, end-of-year chaos, heavy workloads, or deadlines, but it is one of the greatest gifts you can give your students. Firstly, it shows them that you are in control. More importantly, it tells them that regardless of their actions, there is always an opportunity to do better. This way, the relationship is never broken.

If you stay calm, you create an environment where students feel safe, respected, and understood, and that is key to building a positive relationship with them.

Body Language

One of the best ways to show that you remain calm is through your body language. As a language teacher, I can tell you that most communication is non-verbal. This makes body language one of the most important tools for connecting with your students and, therefore, crucial for building a strong relationship with them.

Your body language sets the tone in the classroom, so it’s essential to learn how to control it and use it to your advantage. If your body language is aggressive, it will be impossible to build a positive connection because students’ brains will perceive you as a threat. Instead, focus on using positive body language.

Maintain a relaxed facial expression, smiling when possible. Use your arms and hands naturally, avoiding aggressive movements. This will help create a relaxed and safe environment, which is exactly what we need to establish a strong foundation for our relationship with students.

When interacting with them, keep an open posture and avoid crossing your arms. It shows that you care. Nod when they speak and lean slightly forward to show interest in what they are saying. Most importantly, maintain eye contact with them during lessons. This helps them feel involved and reassures them that they are seen and valued.

As you can see, body language is a powerful tool that you need to master. It will give you a strong advantage when building positive relationships with your students.

I hope these tips and stories inspire you to bring a little extra humor and calm into your classroom. These small things do make a big difference when it comes to building meaningful relationships with your students.