Keep Your Eye On The Prize

Do you love everything in your life? Do you love everybody you know? Do you love everything you do? Do you love every aspect of your job? If your answer to all of these is a resounding 'YES', then congratulations, you have won at life!

However, if you're like the vast majority of people, you likely struggle with one or all of these, and I'm here to tell you that it's okay. The world is filled with billions of people who sometimes don't love their jobs, their families, their friends, their habits, their lifestyle, or even their outlook on life. Does that make us any less fulfilled, or are we simply distracting ourselves from what's really important?

In my own limited experience, I spent years trying to "have it all", and it made me deeply unhappy. I used to feel that if I didn't have the perfect job or the perfect relationship that there was something wrong with me. As a result I was rarely satisfied with my life as there was always a sense of lacking. It also led to countless sleepless nights where my mind would be restlessly evaluating everything and wondering what the possibilities could have been. Social media definitely fueled this fire through it's portrayal of perfect lives.

Very few people know that I'm my own worst critic. I spent years setting unrealistic expectations for myself, sacrificing my well-being to pursue those expectations, and then breaking down when I eventually failed to meet my own expectations. Over the years, mostly thanks to my wife, I began to look at my life from different perspectives. At first I didn't believe her when she called me 'smart', 'cute', 'caring', or 'successful' because I didn't feel good enough. I'm ashamed to say that I sometimes projected that insecurity on others.

Her support and unconditional love eventually broke through to me, and I began to realize what was truly important to me. The 'prize' I needed to keep my eye on was a healthy, happy, and loving marriage. Everything else in life exists to serve that purpose. Whether I love my job or not doesn't matter. Whether I love everything I do or not doesn't matter. It obviously helps if I love those things, but the only thing that matters is the 'prize'. I'm happy to report that I've been much happier on average since then. I still have good and bad days, but there are more good days and fewer bad days now.

What can you take away from this? (TL:DR)

Life, in all it's complexities can be disappointing, but focusing on what truly matters to you can help simplify life and avoid unnecessary disappointment.

Till next time, stay curious.