Keep it Classy Out There!

Several years back when my son was deep into competitive youth soccer, I had an epic encounter. To frame it out, his team was quite good that season, they played as a cohesive unit and rallied behind their head coach. The boys made it to a late season semi-final game against a powerhouse they shouldn’t have been able to compete with. In the first half and a good portion of the second, their coach put together a fantastic defensive formation that stifled their superior competition. Slightly after half, the other coach was ejected from the game due to pent up frustration and ultimately, swearing at a couple of our boys, yes swearing as an adult at a handful of 13 year-old boys on the pitch. It soon became evident that this culture was pervasive on both the player side of the field as well as the parent side of the field.

A mom from the other team took exception to the cheering on our side and decided to single me out. She came over, began swearing at me and all I could think to say was “Keep it Classy Wayzata.” For those not in MN, Wayzata is a wealthy community on the Northeast shore of Lake Minnetonka. An affluent community to say the least.

No sooner than I said that she looked at my shirt (the one I'm wearing in the picture above) and tried to fire a comeback in my direction. Little did she know… “You, you… Abe Froman!” She exclaimed. My response was simple and timely, “That’s right, I am the Sausage King of Chicago.” I had no clue my love for the movie Ferris Bueller’s Day Off would come in handy at that exact moment. Those that know me, I can have some witty comebacks, but this one was too good to be true! Special shout out to Dale Hanson for gifting me that Abe Froman shirt that I still wear today.

You might ask, what does this have to do with Technology Sales and a LinkedIn post? Let me tie it all together.

Burning Bridges

I’ve long wondered why people take it upon themselves to burn a bridge when departing an organization. After all, this is a much smaller community than people realize. I’m often called, texted, or emailed for unsolicited feedback on someone I’ve worked with in the past. I know many others that experience similar calls weekly and monthly. “You worked with so and so, would you hire them again given the chance?”

My most recent experience with this was via text, but not the reference check you’re thinking. An ex-co-worker took it upon themselves to text me out of the blue about 45 days ago. This individual took exception with the way something went down with a member on my team. I take extreme ownership and pride in the way I lead and the way the leaders on my team lead, so it was certainly concerning. However, this was an attack at me.

Fast forward to this week, 45 days later and the same person texted me again a bit later in the evening. There are so many potential reasons for a random text like this, or are there??? At the end, it just felt a bit off. Could it have been a bad day, other external pressures, could alcohol have been involved or did they simply have to get something off their chest? Who knows? I’ll likely never know. The fact of the matter is the text got a bit more direct and a little more heated than the one 45 days back.

One of the questions that came across was, “How do you sleep well at night…” For me, that’s simple. I worry about the things I can control, my Attitude and my Effort. Not to oversimplify the meaning of life, but for me... I really try to anchor back on this philosophy. I’ve had the opportunity to spend time with someone I’d consider to be a great leader – Tom Mendoza . Both Tom and Lou Holtz (ex-Notre Dame head football coach) have been known to say you control your attitude. A handful of years back coaching youth sports I added the effort component to that philosophical outlook, and I live by it to this day. ?Many of my team members and peers have heard me share this philosophy regularly.

Having participated in numerous mentor, mentee, and coaching relationships, one thing I always tell people is you own your brand. Burning a bridge, sending an errant text, flaming someone because you feel like it, these can all have a lasting effect on your brand. This especially holds true in a small work community like IT Sales that I’ve called my work home for over 25 years. Did I mention I’ve known the individual's new manager for 16+ years? Ultimately, I took the highroad, there’s no need for me to respond further or risk tarnishing my brand. I simply blocked the phone number.

In closing, think twice before hitting send on that email, text, or voice mail. Once it’s out there, it’s out there and it can be brand impacting. By the way, the boys ended up losing to a far superior team that day 1-0 and just missed making the State Tournament.

Be a better human and “Keep it classy out there!”