Keep Calm & Carry On

?

Emotional regulation is the process of controlling and managing our feelings. It involves adjusting the intensity of our emotions, making them more or less intense as needed.

?

Individuals can use techniques, such as cognitive reappraisal and mindfulness exercises, to manage challenging circumstances and regulate their emotions effectively.

?

Emotional control boosts personal happiness and fosters stronger connections with others. It equips individuals with the strength to navigate challenges and difficult situations, enhancing their relationships.

?

Managing emotions is a skill that individuals typically acquire as they mature; some may find it more effortless than others to control their feelings effectively.?

?

Emotional regulation encompasses a series of mechanisms that impact.

?

What feelings a person experiences?

?

When individuals experience those feelings.

?

How they feel and show these feelings.

?

Emotional regulation should not be mistaken for getting rid of or managing emotions. Instead, it is for adjusting how one experiences those feelings in the moment. It involves being able to change the strength or intensity of an emotion by altering it.?

?

Having the ability to regulate the strength of emotions can aid in managing behaviour.

?

How we react emotionally.?

?

Feeling emotions like anger often arise when one feels threatened or powerless.?

?

What makes emotional control so important?

?

Controlling our emotions is crucial as they are closely intertwined with our thoughts and feelings. They influence our decision-making and effectively guide our actions. This understanding will instil a sense of confidence and security in individuals.?

?

Acquiring the ability to manage our emotions enables us to make decisions rather than act impulsively and potentially regret our choices later.

?

This implies that we can enhance our ability to handle relationships with others effectively, solve problems and maintain health.

?

When we suppress or ignore our feelings and emotions, it can lead to feelings of helplessness and negativity, as persistent thoughts and resentment, which may escalate into increased frustration and potentially contribute to the onset of conditions like anxiety or depression along with physical symptoms.?

?

Ways people commonly manage their emotions

?

Here are a few ways people typically manage their emotions, some beneficial and others less helpful.

?

Ways to promote health

?

These may consist of the following options.

?

Engaging in meditation or mindfulness practices.

?

Embarking on therapy.

?

Discussing feelings with friends.

?

Sharpen your intelligence abilities.

?

Putting thoughts on paper in a diary.

?

Recognising the importance of taking a breather and enjoying some time.

Ensuring healthy habits for a night's sleep.?

?

?

Strategies that are detrimental to one's health.

?

Here are some examples.

?

Self-harming actions

?

Substance misuse and alcohol consumption

?

Indulging in comfort food to soothe distress

?

Steering clear of challenging circumstances. Pulling away from them.

?

Spending time on social media at the expense of other duties.

?

Feeling disconnected from society. Experiencing loneliness.

?

?

Emotional dysregulation is when a person has difficulty managing their emotions. This can lead to them using unhealthy coping mechanisms to try and control their feelings.

?

Difficulty managing emotions refers to employing methods to ease or control feelings.

?

It's not uncommon for people to sometimes use unhealthy ways to handle their emotions. For instance, instead of dealing with their feelings, they might turn to substance abuse, overeating, or even self-harm.?

?

In a situation where a friend fails to show up for a planned lunch date with you, rather than exploring valid reasons for their absence if one were to feel hurt or abandoned by this occurrence owing to emotional regulation challenges.

?

Anger or resentment might cause them to act on those emotions by yelling at their friend, blaming them for being a friend, or even pulling away from the friendship altogether.?

?

When someone is faced with a situation and struggles to manage their emotions effectively, they may feel overwhelmed by feelings and find it challenging to stay in control of their emotional responses.

?

When we let our emotions get the best of us and act impulsively or irrationally because we feel out of balance, we may find ourselves caught in a cycle of emotions that can be difficult to break free from.?

?

The balance between being regulated and not being regulated enough falls on a spectrum of dysregulation, making it challenging to comfort oneself and return to an emotional state.

?

Someone experiencing difficulties in regulating their emotions might;

?

People may experience a decreased awareness and comprehension of their emotions.

?

Struggle with controlling actions.

?

Experiencing intense and fluctuating feelings.

?

Be very attuned to feelings in situations.

?

People who struggle with emotion dysregulation often exhibit a variety of behaviours.

?

Disassociating

?

Feeling numb.

?

Fury

?

Outbursts of aggression

?

Acting without thinking and taking risks

?

Substance misuse

?

Steering clear

?

Self-harming actions

?

"What are the factors that contribute to difficulties in managing emotions?"

?

Struggling with controlling emotions is often rooted in childhood experiences. Here are some potential reasons why a person might find it challenging to manage their feelings;

?

Disposition

?

Understanding disposition, which is primarily influenced by personal factors, is crucial. It tends to remain consistent over time and in various circumstances; nonetheless, confident children might struggle with controlling their emotions due to their disposition. This knowledge can equip educators and parents with the understanding and tools to scaffold and support children effectively.?

?

It's essential to be vigilant and proactive in noticing variations in temperaments among infants from an early age. Some are relaxed and easy-going, while others show more prolonged stress responses that could negatively affect their emotional control. Early detection can lead to early intervention, helping these children manage their emotions more effectively.?

?

The aftermath of a distressing event

?

Experiencing trauma involves feeling emotions that are too overwhelming for an individual to comprehend or deal with effectively. It can lead to paralysis, where consciousness is momentarily suspended or impaired.

?

Experiencing trauma, especially during childhood, can significantly impact an individual's ability to manage their emotions. This can lead to a reliance on specific coping mechanisms to deal with negative feelings.?

?

Children who have experienced trauma, such as abuse, become at a higher risk of developing long-term difficulties in managing their emotions effectively.?

?

Different ways of forming connections

?

During these crucial stages of life, caregivers' role in shaping how well we manage our emotions is invaluable. Their support and guidance are integral in helping children learn self-soothing skills and manage their emotions effectively.

?

Without this support, children may struggle to learn self-soothing skills and depend on sources for comfort.

?

Attachment styles characterised by insecurity often stem from parental support, where caregivers may show inconsistency in their availability or be extreme and dismissive of emotions.

?

As we grow and develop, we may adopt ways of dealing with our emotions, such as holding them in or overreacting. These learned behaviours can stay with us into adulthood, resulting in challenges with managing our emotions.

?

Lack of awareness.

?

Insufficient emotional intelligence (EI ) may result in the management of emotions through channels.

?

Having an intelligence (EI) can lead some individuals to struggle to identify and manage their emotions effectively.

?

Misinterpreting Feelings: Devising a strategy for dealing with emotions can be challenging when one needs to entirely grasp the reasons or stimuli behind them.

A lack of intelligence can lead to emotional responses without thinking or reflecting on one's actions.

?

It can be challenging for intelligent individuals to communicate their feelings, resulting in misunderstandings or disagreements effectively.

?

Lack of Emotional Intelligence can lead to diminished empathy toward others, escalating conflicts and making them challenging to resolve.

?

Inadequate Ways of Dealing with Problems: When people lack the understanding that comes from having intelligence (EI), they may turn to unhelpful tactics such as avoiding issues or turning to substance abuse and aggression.

?

Insufficient management of emotions during childhood could heighten the risk of developing health conditions.

This condition might include intense emotions and sudden temper tantrums during childhood development . Anger, irritability, and significant reactions to feelings are features of this condition.?

Similarly, individuals with a disorder may experience symptoms linked to difficulties in managing their emotions.

?

Managing emotions can sometimes be challenging under certain circumstances.

?

Borderline personality disorder, often abbreviated as BPD.

?

Individuals with this condition frequently experience sensitivity. Fluctuating negative moods while lacking effective regulation strategies and relying on unhelpful coping mechanisms.

?

Post-traumatic stress disorder, known as CPTSD.

?

People who have gone through trauma like violence or neglect during their childhood or adulthood are often diagnosed with this condition called Complex Post Stress Disorder (CPTSD). In some cases, managing emotions can be challenging as it involves struggling to calm oneself when upset and experiencing emotional numbness.?

?

The disorder is known as mood dysregulation disorder (DMDD).

?

This condition might include intense emotions and sudden temper tantrums during childhood development. Anger, irritability, and significant reactions to feelings are features of this condition.?

?

Autism spectrum disorder, abbreviated as ASD.

?

Autism frequently presents challenges in managing emotions for individuals affected by it; they often experience heightened emotions or irritability, as well as difficulties in problem-solving and sensing others' emotions due to being easily overwhelmed by stimuli.?

?

ADHD stands for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder

The inability to control emotions is an indicator of ADHD. Individuals dealing with the condition tend to overreact to setbacks and experience emotions more deeply than others do while struggling to calm themselves down or cope with frustration and irritation effectively.?

?

The pattern of anguish in life

?

Avoiding or downplaying unpleasant emotions is often called being caught in a cycle of shame. This behaviour typically mirrors the Experimental Avoidance model, which suggests that self-harm is mainly driven by the desire to escape or avoid situations through negative reinforcement.

?

This action helps smooth out emotions' ups and downs until the next instance occurs, and it can be used as any coping mechanism individuals rely on to manage their emotions effectively.?

?

When individuals resort to coping with challenges and setbacks, they often find themselves dissatisfied with these approaches despite their temporary success in addressing immediate issues. These behaviours can contribute to shame and inadequacy, perpetuating the cycle. This pattern sets the groundwork for a loop of emotions and behaviours.?

?

Putting an end to the cycle of distress.

?

Altering any aspect of the routine could disrupt the flow, which can foster optimism and well-being.?

?

Methods like the ones used in therapy (CBT) can assist you in grasping and managing the connection between your thoughts, emotions, and behaviours effectively.?

?

I'd like you to reflect on the questions and understand how your thoughts and emotions influence your behaviour.

?

What specific notions or mental frameworks evoke a response in your mind?

?

What feelings do you struggle with the most? Find it hard to cope with?

?

What do you usually do to calm yourself down when feeling anxious?

?

How effectively do these methods address both term and long-term circumstances?

?

Do you have any core beliefs about yourself or the world that contribute to a spiral of negativity?

?

What specific ideas and beliefs bring about the feelings for you instead?

?

Dealing with emotions can involve employing approaches to manage the most intense feelings effectively.

?

Often, individuals stick to strategies without adapting them; they might consistently rely on an unproductive approach in all unfavourable circumstances.

?

To break free from a cycle of distress, it's essential to take the time to reflect on your thoughts and how you deal with challenges.?

?

Emotional regulation abilities

?

Mastering techniques to control our emotions can empower us to handle and alter our responses in various circumstances.

?

Name the feeling

?

Steering clear of thoughts and emotions can lead to experiencing unwanted negative thoughts and emotions. Instead of ignoring feelings like sadness, anger, or fear when they arise, you should address them directly by acknowledging their presence and labelling them specifically; for instance, say out loud or think to yourself, "Right now, I am feeling sad/upset/scared."

?

If you're unsure how you feel emotionally or need accurate guidance to pinpoint your emotions, consider using a "Feelings Wheel." This tool showcases a range of secondary emotions that individuals commonly experience.?

?

Naming an emotion can sometimes diminish its impact. Labelling allows us to release some of the distress and unease linked with feelings while also helping us better acknowledge and comprehend our emotions.

?

It is reasonable to assume that individuals who struggle to understand their feelings may also have difficulty recognising and addressing their needs.?

?

Being mindful of the sensations in your body can aid in developing an understanding of your emotions.

?

Sometimes, you might experience a sensation in your stomach when you're anxious or a sense of heaviness in your chest when you're sad.?

?

Confirm the feeling

?

Recognising that emotions exist for a purpose and convey messages to you.?

?

Engaging in self-care is crucial for nurturing self-kindness and providing comfort during challenging times. Recognising that experiencing negative feelings is simply part of the human experience is also vital.?

?

Take a moment to connect with your emotions by focusing on your breath and gently placing your hand on the part of your body that holds those emotions close to you as you take intentional breaths.?

?

Please check within yourself to see if there's a way to deal with this emotion without feeling pressured to take action.?

?

Address stimuli

?

Sometimes, we perceive a situation in a way that stirs our emotions. We need to identify what triggers these emotions to manage them effectively.

?

Recognising what sets you off can help tackle the root problem and alter how you react emotionally.

?

Remember that based on your knowledge, you can decide how to react and what actions to take.?

?

?

Use descriptions to evoke feelings and bring about a change in experiences.

?

Another technique for influencing emotions is using imagery. Visualising things taps into the right side of your brain and can evoke emotions quickly.

?

Imagine going to a moment that felt like too much to handle. Perhaps a memory of being mistreated or rejected in childhood comes to mind. Visualise yourself as a vulnerable child in that memory; what emotions surface at that moment? Fear of loneliness and shame. Take a moment to sit with these emotions and picture yourself stepping into that scene to help. Extend protection and care to the child version of yourself; tend to their needs. Provide a sense of safety and comfort that was missing back then. Engage in a conversation with the child within you so you can better understand their distress and offer support accordingly.

?

Through this process of reimagining experiences and symbolically addressing underlying emotional wounds, new feelings of compassion and understanding begin to surface naturally. The old sources of distress gradually diminish in impact over time.

?

Practice and immersing oneself in memories, with clarity and emotion, triggers a sense of self-kindness and understanding within us. This process not only aids in healing emotional scars but also helps stabilise our current feelings.

?

https://www.anxietycounsellingsupport.co.uk/