Just Say No

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As an entrepreneur in my ninth year of business, I’ve had some time to reflect on what has helped me grow my business and stay passionate about my work.

Saying no.

That might surprise you, but it’s one of the lessons that took the longest to learn and has helped me the most.

Here’s why. When you’re incredibly clear on your vision and focused on what’s ahead, you can spot distractions much faster. And then it’s just a matter of not letting them get in your way.

I used to feel guilty about saying no.

A no would come with an over-the-top apology. "Sorry, I can’t take this call right now... I’ll respond in five minutes. Is that okay? So sorry I’m not at your beck and call!"

Okay, maybe that’s a bit over the top. But truly, I felt guilty about not picking up my phone. I felt guilty about not responding ASAP to everything. I felt guilty about not saying yes when someone asked for a favor. And probably the biggest struggle: I felt guilty turning down opportunities—fearing that saying no meant lost revenue.

No is a complete sentence. It doesn’t require an apology.

Because our time is our greatest asset. And our time is our choice.

Saying no more often freed me up to say yes to the big things. Yes to my dream client. Yes to work that challenges and excites me. Yes to writing more. Yes to connecting with the people I love.

In the workplace, particularly in customer experience, saying no is just as vital. We often feel pressure to say yes to every request, every new initiative, or every customer interaction. But if we say yes to everything, we risk losing sight of what truly drives value—both for our customers and for the business.

It’s simple: You are what you eat. And that doesn’t just mean food. It’s about what you read, what you watch, who you surround yourself with, and the work you do. All of it shapes who you are. So choose wisely—especially in customer experience. The habits, processes, and resources you invest in will shape the experiences you deliver.

I’m not perfect at this. I still get caught up in scrolling through Instagram. I accept meetings I shouldn’t. I sometimes get tangled in unnecessary drama. It’s part of being human. Even Stephen Covey admitted that he could only practice the seven habits about 80% of the time.

It’s counter to how many of us were raised. We were taught to accept whatever came our way. “You get what you get, and you don’t throw a fit.”

I find myself parenting quite differently. We write user stories in our house. They start with: “I want to... so that...” This helps us prioritize, be clear, and decisive about how we spend our time. We reflect. We improve. We move forward.

And sure, I’ve turned down some pretty exciting stuff, as have others. LeBron James passed on the LA Clippers, allowing him to join the Miami Heat for his first two NBA championships. Jim Carrey famously visualized his success before it happened. He wrote himself a check for $10 million for "acting services rendered," dating it for 1994, and kept it in his wallet. He turned down everything from Buddy the Elf to Captain Jack Sparrow to Austin Powers. Ryan Smith, CEO of Qualtrics, rejected an offer to acquire the company for $500 million. (On August 30, 2023, Qualtrics had a market cap of $10.99 billion USD.)

Of course, not every decision is perfect. Will Smith turned down the role of Neo in The Matrix, believing that Wild Wild West would allow him to show his range.

Sorry Will. You messed up on this one.

I almost turned down my first date with my husband. I was running late at the office. But he didn’t give up. He was patient. He committed to saying yes. And when he proposed? My answer was simple: Without a doubt.

In customer experience, we’re constantly juggling competing priorities. Saying yes to every request can pull us away from the bigger picture—enhancing the customer journey. We need to prioritize what will create the most meaningful impact, just as we prioritize opportunities in business.

It’s all about intention. What’s your end goal? Are your habits getting you closer to that success?

So next time you feel the urge to say yes—whether it’s a new customer request, a team initiative, or an opportunity—ask yourself: Is this moving me toward my vision?

If not, say no. And own it.

LoyaltyCraft was built from a passion for helping companies create meaningful customer experiences. Founded in 2016 by Lauren Feehrer CCXP, we focus on strategy, qualitative research, customer design, and employee engagement to help mid-market companies open the door to new customers and keep existing ones from leaving out the backdoor.

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