JUST ROCK IT AND DON’T GIVE A CRAP

I am going to share some awesome articles I have written and brilliant excerpts from my books to inspire you all with your inner leadership, confidence and courage.

This is from my book JUST ROCK IT! and is today one of my favourite keynotes

You’ve had a dream or come up with an idea—something that excites you, that really makes you think long and hard about why you’re slogging away at your day job, or your night job, or whatever unsatisfying venture you’ve currently got going on.

You think you might quit everything else and tackle your idea, head on.

But you don’t.

If this sounds familiar, know that I wrote this article and the book Just Rock It! for you.

However, if you’ve already run, whooping, from your office, whilst ripping off your tie and leaving a trail of papers in your wake, all the while shouting, “Sayonara, suckers!” (and most definitely burning all your bridges in the process), keep reading—you need my books even more. There are lots of great nuggets of wisdom.

As I travel the world, I meet so many people who are not living or creating the lives of their dreams. They doubt themselves; they’re scared; they don’t want to fail, put their hand up, take the risk; or they don’t want to put themselves out there. I know this takes courage. Courage which is within us all.

It breaks my heart. It leaves me asking, “Why?”

You’re destined for more. I know you are. If you actually go for what you want, what is the worst that could happen?

I wrote my books because I’m so freaking over hearing people claim a lack of self-confidence, watching people sabotage themselves, and seeing others put people down. I am truly over the fact that we live in a culture and society today where it’s frowned upon if we advocate for and believe in ourselves. I mean, really?

Again, why?

On my 46th birthday which was a few years ago now, I stood in a room with a group of people who were all part of a conference I was attending to help teenagers build their confidence and leadership skills. Most importantly, I was there with my beautiful 15-year-old daughter, who had been struggling with her sense of self-worth and self-belief. I was there to learn how to be a better leader and mother.

Frankly, it was the last thing I wanted to do on my birthday. Even though I live and breathe this stuff and can inspire, empower and grow leadership and leaders all over the world, I was dreading doing it with the most important person in my world.

I thought she would find it confronting, and agonising, and thought that her sullenness might make the entire experience most definitely not a walk in the park.

What I experienced and learned was unexpected. It brought back a rush of memories for me and seemed to transport me back to my pre-teen years. I began to remember the times when I didn’t feel good enough, smart enough, and when I felt I had flat-out failed.

Here I was, turning 46, and I felt like my 12-year-old self all over again. Believe me, it was a humbling feeling, especially with my young daughter right next to me, experiencing the very same thing.

At the end of the seminar, though, I had come full circle. I reminded myself that I’m a smart, successful and amazing leader and mother who is good enough. And the best part? My daughter was grinning by the end of it, saying, “Wow, Mum. You really do this stuff all the time? That was great!”

I decided to write my books and blogs for those people who can’t seem to grasp their potential, their greatness; for those who want a life where they can be the best version of themselves. These people (you!) simply need a little nudge, a little bit of support, confidence or motivation to rock it.

One thing I would say to you, to everyone and my younger self is...

DON’T GIVE A CRAP

(YOU’VE GOT ZERO TIME FOR THAT. NONE.)

Have I got your attention? Yes? Good.

If 90 percent of everything is crap, then let’s focus on the other 10 percent, or basically, the things you actually give a crap about.

As you may already know, I published my first book entitled Leadership Attitude. It was one of the best experiences I’ve ever had and also one of the most challenging.

As a leadership expert, you might think that writing a book about leadership would have been a snap for me. Well, it could have been—except that I got inside my own head and made it way tougher than it should have been.

After I published my book, can you guess the one question I was invariably asked? All. The. Time?

You got it. “How long did it take you to write the book?”

“Bloody forever!” I always wanted to shout at well-meaning folks. However, I always replied (and still do) with a serene and socially appropriate response: “Oh, a few years. I wish I knew it was going to be as easy as it was, as I would have done it sooner.”

As I neared the final chapters of the book, it really was easier. Do you know why?

Because, toward the end of the book, I didn’t give a crap about what people thought of it. I had been so worried in the beginning about what people would think that I developed a giant case of writer’s block every time I sat down to write.

Once I decided I didn’t give a crap about what others thought, only what I thought and wanted to accomplish, the words perpetually flowed from my fingertips onto the pages.

Let’s switch gears, right here. (See what I did there? I wanted to change the subject, so I did! And did I give a crap?)

I’ll let you answer that one.

My sister said I absolutely need to read the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fu*k by Mark Manson. Of course, wildly intrigued by the title, I read it. (How many books has Manson sold from the title alone? Genius!)

Anyway, what resonated with me the most was the way Manson’s book explains how we need the negative experiences and struggles in our lives. Sometimes I really believe we need to stop—just stop!—pretending everything is perfect. Stop painting the illusion of a perfect life on Facebook and stop chronicling the 80,000 great things you have and do each day on social media. What if we did post our struggles and the negative aspects of our lives instead? Maybe we could more readily help each other. But when everyone pretends like everything’s hunky-dory all the time, how do we do that?

Again, we need the negative parts of our lives to truly appreciate the positives. And we all need to get rid of the excess cacophony all around us—in essence, the crap.

Since we’re being honest with each other (and doing away with our rainbows-and-unicorns, beautiful social media posts), let me share with you the most devastating event that happened in my life 13 years ago: my then-husband and I split up. He unexpectedly left my 4-year-old daughter and me whilst we were living in a foreign country. I never saw it coming. I spent days crying in the corner; grieving, yes—make no mistake about that.

However, this tragic day (really, it is a tiny blip if you consider the complete span of my life) ended up changing the entire trajectory of?my life and channeled my future directly into a defined, positive role. It was the day I made a choice to reinvent myself and reframe my experience.

Has this ever happened to you? Has a negative experience rocked your world, but ended up being a powerful or life-changing force—for good?

So, in the spirit of being honest (see how easy it is?), there are days where I feel that building and growing an amazing business whilst being a full-time single mum is an exhausting struggle, but I get up and do it every day. Why?

Because I get to make a difference. Because there are so many positives that outweigh the negatives. Because I can grow and challenge myself. Because I can do it, and show my daughter strength of character and resilience, and prove that she can be indomitable, too.

Every day, I refuse to get bogged down by the minutiae of the day-to-day; I’ve simply resolved not to give a crap about the crap. In sum, I don’t give a crap about people who try to put holes in my rowboat, to the thoughts that don’t serve me, to the worry and stress about things I have no control over and that don’t matter. The “not giving a crap” also allows me to devote my attention to the right things: My purpose in this life, the people who are important to me (especially my daughter) and the ways I can make a difference in the world.

So, it’s about not giving a crap. But yes, it is also about giving a crap—about the right things. As Mark Manson states in his book, “You only have a limited amount of fu*ks to give. So you must choose them wisely.”

Give it a go! Watch your world transform! Practise the art of not giving a crap—on the things that don’t matter.

I implore you all to focus on what makes you rock, have the courage to rock it and live a life of rocking it. It goes way too fast...

Don’t be afraid! You’ve totally got this.

P.S. Always stay kind and courageous for yourself and others...

Share below down things that you won’t give a crap about....?

By?Sonia McDonald?– CEO Of?LeadershipHQ?And?McDonald Inc.?Leadership Coach, Global Keynote Speaker, Entrepreneur, CEO And Award Winning Author.

When Sonia speaks, everyone in the room feels like she is having a conversation with them as her audience will feel as if they are the only one in the room. She speaks from the heart. She is brave. She wants everyone to be brave. She is an impactful and motivational leadership expert and speaker that creates a life-changing experience. People call Sonia sassy, inspirational, real and a speaker who leaves a lasting impression. Her high-energy, authenticity and humour combined with actionable and practical advice, empowers her audience and provides them with great drive and confidence to take courageous action sand inspire great leadership in all aspects of their lives.

She is also a renowned and award-winning author, having written several of her own books, Leadership Attitude, Just Rock It! and First Comes Courage as well as being a regular contributor in The Australian, HRD Magazine, Smart Healthy Women and Women’s Business Media. She was named as one of the Top 250 Influential Women in the world as well as Top 100 Australian Entrepreneurs by Richtopia.

Through her leadership advisory and coaching work at LeadershipHQ, and founding the Outstanding Leadership Awards, Sonia is internationally recognised as an expert in leadership and culture, organisational development, neuroscience, kindness, and courage.

She is also a full-time single parent and has a passion for women in business and teenage mental health. Sonia travels and speaks across Australia and Globe, and she is on a mission to building a world of great leaders and leadership.