Just be ourselves? We are not robots yet..

At what point will we remember to be ourselves?

For as long as i can remember in my professional career, I've attended training sessions where I've been taught how best to engage with colleagues and employees, customers and suppliers. I've been shown how to draft proposals, letters, emails. Experts have schooled me on succession planning, gold sheets, tone of voice, NLP, how to be more confident, how to be less confident, how to manage pipeline, how to ask tough questions etc etc. I've been told that its Art and not Science, then Science and not Art. I've loved some of it and been indifferent to some. We all have haven't we?

We have all experienced a training course that was amazing and we have all benefited. We have all been fortunate that our employer has made such a personal investment in us, and our success. I absolutely welcome these investments as the real beauty, in my experience, is that you pretty much always take on board a new concept or theory which you can put into practice. 

Here's the rub. What if you are dealing with someone that has done so so much of this stuff that they actually aren't who they really are anymore? They are unable to string a sentence together without internally navigating their way around a set of pre-determined auto responses using NLP or CBT. Have we become too robotic? What if you are having a conversation with someone who has pre-programmed so much of their behavior that its actually near impossible to get to that base layer of Schein's cultural triangle....

And there i go. Into auto-pilot. I'm trying to get to the base of Schein's cultural triangle and unlock a persons attitudes and beliefs and underlying assumptions of morality, employment, health, prosperity. Why??? Will i really understand them better?

My point here is this. All of the above is very useful and should be embraced. Indeed a multi-billion pound global industry exists on the fact that companies and individuals want to improve themselves and their effectiveness through training. BUT - Please lets not lose sight of who we really are, how we really talk and what we really want. We are people, Humans, not robots. The smashing thing about working where i do is that i get to have really great conversations with clients that lead to actual actions and outcomes. I get to connect with people (not always but often) and understand the stuff that worries them - as people. They share the things that are holding them back and invite me in to their challenges so i can connect them with other people - not other robots.   

Now when i sit down with another person i try and remember that bit first. The rest will follow. It feels good being open and honest. Its great to be - a person.  

Right - I'm off to watch 'The Matrix' again...